Love and Hearbreaks

number. It was a woman identifying herself as Gabriela, warning me to be careful

at unconsciously, an alert went off in me, although I forgot about it since I had nothing

ren for many days. He had been promoted to head of traumatology department at the clini

like me to be at home with the children to assist them more with school tasks and take them to all extracurricular activities they were enrolled in at school, just like other m

the children. Until now, I had been able to lead a balanced life, giving enough time to my children and home, but as a woman, I also needed my

d. I was already thirty-six years old, and I was not sure if I wanted another one. I told him it had not been easy to raise my two

d it once, and he should respect my way of thinking. It did not mean I did not lo

my boyfriend or partner, an ornament. He told me I should feel grateful because he was with me; he was successful, earned good money, and could have any woman

not ask him anything, as I assumed he would go out to clear his mind and calm

a pilgrimage to the bathroom every twenty minutes, vomiting and lying back down to t

ried to reject him, but he did not listen, only repeating, "Forgive me, I don't know what happened. I got upset and lost control." I tried to calm him down, saying it had not been that bad, that he should sleep, and we could t

iredness, meant that I did not get excited enough to reach or

was colitis and vomiting, so I had to go to the emergency room

hout. Diagnosis: viral gastroenteritis, which conf

f the time to recover. Pablo was quite absent during tho

nued to arrive late, sought me extraordinarily little sexually, and I had the sensation that he w

ill, when the children went to their father's and we were alone, he traveled or made-u

he responded immediately and said her intention was only to warn me because nobody had warned her, and she had gone through a tough

nage to find moments where he made cruel comments or intended to belittle me, which I had minimized or did not want to see. But now, things made a bit more sense to me. I asked her if

e, but anyway, I started paying atten

edical conference. I asked if I could accompany him, and he said no bec

ok appointments on the days he claimed to be in Argentina. I immediately called my friends to tell them what was going on, and w

onference, and I was incredibly nervous and anxious. I could

e of my friends, confirming our suspicions: Pablo was

se I did not love him. I decided to gather evidence to confront him, as he always had an answer for e

ed for that day. It was the first one of the cycle, and I remembered that my period had not come. I got scared, but the

st. Unfortunately, he only had available slots for the following week. To calm my anxiety

te with the first urine of the day. After leaving it on the bathroom co

had arrived in Chile and was going straight to the clinic for scheduled appointments

pregnancy test. In the bathroom, it lay on the shelf, moc

s erroneous, but then I remembered people always say there are false negativ

sked them to come to my house with two or three different pregn

took them one by one; all four were positive. I burst into tears, and my friends tried

ertainly did not love him. It made no sense to continue with him. However, no

m that same night. He would be happy with the news, as he had always wanted a child

ly gets worse. I was not a child anymore to see life so romantically. Moreover, life, although it treated me well, had thrown

entered the house and saw me, he hugged me and caressed my hair. I

rt, and we nervously laughed. I was a

ands, and one of his legs trembled. I

en in love with someone else, and we're going to have

he was telling me. I wo

ting on me with someone else. Nevertheless, internally, I appreciated his honesty and that

at he loved my children and family, but he did not feel loved or valued. According to him, I had not appreciated what we h

future that awaited me. He looked at me with a questioning expression; he thought I

was already too late, and nothing would make him change his decision. He preferred not to know anything more abo

someone to pick up his belongings. When he stood up to

it's not worth it an

s leaving; I did not love him, although I had learned to care for him. However, lately,

aise a child alone; this tim

I had not planned to get pregnant; it was not in my plan. In fact, I was taking contraceptives, and un

aps if I had paid more attention to Pablo, put more

ake decisions, and I would do that with the help of my fri

eded to do was go to the gynecologist to check on my

likely that I got pregnant during the week I was sick and vomited. I had vomited all the contraceptive pills I had taken those

mmediately performed an ultrasound to see how

ned and warned me. He said that although there was a yolk sac, he could not s

not clear about what that meant, I preferred to wait fo

more children later. He tried to console me, but I was not sad. On the contrary, I was relieved, as I

for a spontaneous abortion to occur, which would come like a period, probably a bit h

able to eat anything all day. I called my friends to share the news. We agreed to mee