The Remarkable History of Sir Thomas Upmore, bart., M.P., formerly known as Tommy Upmore""

soaring above our heads; but I have always found myself so unlucky in this matter, as in many others, that nothing would ever come into my head,

ssed them-which must, according to his demonstration, have been inside me, at my first flight. Very likely they were; and even if they were not, it would

an, how much less would be said and written! Nevertheless all biologists, psychologists, anthropologists, and the rest of our race who make it their study (after

ellishment by Chumps-hardly had got through their breakfast before some eminent "scientists" were at them. For my part, having made a hearty supper, (after long scar

ng, at the place where my head had made the hole, "extreme surprise at the narrowness of you

ailed to make out what people meant, "science is what I

that of Professor Brachipod, "in consulting the interests of science, we shall consult those

, which I knew to be my father's, "by calling my wife your dear indee

cientific squeak; and out went Professor Brachip

's views may be erroneous; but to eliminate him, because of somatic inferiority, is counter to the tendency of the age.

s temper was put up; "an Englishman's house is his castle. No science have a right to come spoiling his breakfast

was "eliminated," because he was a strong man, and did not

r shouted from his threshold, "the science he gets wil

not like the way of it. However, I hoped for the best, and went down in my trousers and braces to breakfast. My father was gone to his boiling

greatest men in the kingdom have been here, to prove that you do it from reasons of Herod, Heroditical something-but he was a bad man, and murdered a million of little ones. They may prove what they like; and of course they

d not help it. Because I was so empty, and felt certa

ound for want of victuals, when your father clears eight pounds a week. Deny it as he may, I can prov

well as I could, with my mouth quite full of good bacon, an

e Bible. You cannot help flying

d old Rum would have caned me, if he could reach

d gentleman, with white hair, 'old Rum'? But never mi

when Bill Chumps came to dine with us, upon his own stipulation what the dinner was to be), that instead of goi

different as could be. My mother's face was all eyes and mouth, with admiration, delight, excitement, vigorous faith, and desire for more; my father's face was all eyebrows, nose, and lips; and he shook his big head, that neighbour

to argue such questions before young boys. But since you must edify us, out with your

is a good boy enough, in his way; but no angel, no more than his parents be. If ever I see him go up like a bubble, I'll fetch him down sharp with my clout-rake; but if I don't use my rake t

ion; "he is welcome to have a gentle fly now and then, as Providence has so endowed him, and I am sure he would never fly away from

well, he'll be fit to go sky-high again. A likely thing, indeed, that I should pay ten guineas beforehand, for a quarter's board, and tuition in classics and mathemati

t, father! I am sur

ess there's too much to break bulk at rand

ey come right, I say hic, h?c, hoc, and the singular numb

ve business, and what goes on in the week. Dr. Rumbelow mu

he clouds," my father said, sniffing as if he smelled

not a Latin word would come of it. Perhaps I might have done it, if it had not been for Chumps, who kept on putting up his mouth, to blow me some word, bigger than the one that I was

aid my father, "I should like to know what sixpen

whether even Chumps did, for he turned away, lest I shou

common sense! No sensible person can doubt, for a moment, that Tommy knows a great many words of Latin, but is not to be persecuted out of them, in that very coarse manner, at dinner time. Tell me, my dear,"

looking at my father, more than her; "there

g. "What a glorious investment of my ten guineas, to have a son so learned, that he can't produce a word of it, because it all sticks together! To-morrow, my boy

h to make any boy hate learning, to be blamed for it, so unjustly. Would he ever have flown, if it h

as all the clever ladies are. Bill Chumps shall have a glass of wine after his pudding, and Tommy drink water like

promise me one little thing. If Tommy goes back to that L

r he liked to see his pipe filled; "encourage his crop, and discourage his wings. 'Old Rum,' as they c