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Average Jones

Chapter 8 BIG PRINT

Word Count: 6055    |    Released on: 29/11/2017

ds which made the organization unique, his was the only wholly stolid and stupid one. Club tradition declared that he had been admitted solely for the b

s had once suggested to him, as a device for his new

es his "rocks". Ambition, the vice of great souls, burned within Spofford's pigeon-breast. He longed to distinguish himself in the line

ord, on a harsh December noon. But the misgivings were supplanted by pleased surprise whe

ad from Harwi

tained for ra

ents for $50

ey, General D

-Off

self-congratulation. "'Jones'll see into this,' I says to

Spofford. "Oh, you'll explain, will you?" he said softly. "Well, the thing I'd

upon a dispiriting area of rain-sw

s. "What would you do if, coming in here at midnight, you were to see twe

said the sta

ed "but my question wasn't intended t

sily. "I don't know what you're up to,

st case. What

ashed queer," answered Spoff

n," said Jones ta

What're you devili

n't call a

d Spoffor

stle around and

os

you hadn't the sense a po

rse, I

ery thing happen a few nights ago at the Sterriter Building. Knowing that rats

at?" growle

rmal cause for so abnormal a

ship. The building might have been sin

ou can do? I'll giv

aid Spoffor

encountered. D'you think a cat habitually rounds up two dozen rats and then chivies 'em out into the street for sport? McCue didn't have any cat theory. He

, what's that got to do with th

ours could see under the surface print into the really interesting peculiarity of this clipping. N

ed sharp, Average. I used to visit in Harwick, so they asked me to

t. Now tell me

was the "Harwick meteor." At ten-fifteen on the night of December twelfth, the streets being full of people coming from the moving picture show, there was a startling concussion from the overhanging clouds and the astounded populace saw a ball of flame plungi

in itself, was phenomenal. In the excitement of the occasion, however, his absence was not noted. But when, on the following morning, the Reverend Peter Prentice,

orters until, on the afternoon of December fourteenth, a coat and waistcoat were found on the seashore a mile north of the village. The Reverend Mr. Prentice identified the clothes as his son's. Searching parties covered the beach for miles, looking for the

g the slip of paper which he had turned over to Average Jones. "And if you

stay here in case anything turns up at this end. Suppose," he added with a

satisfied with this wild-goose errand.

e lack of a woman's humanizing touch for the Reverend Mr. Prentice was a widower. Overwrought with anxiety and strain, the clergyman, as soon as he had taken his

u. It is all a h

ingly. "Comfort yourself with the ide

I be sure,

advertisement which he held. "I think

lars ransom!" said the minis

pers do not select the sons of impecunious ministers for their prey. Nor do they give addresses thro

sec

n the shore. It was put there to create

supposed that

waistcoat and wade off-shore into a winter sea is beyond my poor powers o

verend Mr. Prentice doubtfully. "Who woul

What time did your son go to his ro

s I remember. A little

ason for his go

h a new fishing outfit just

you take me

e side porch from a window facing north. The charred ruins of a bar

stroyed," said the Reverend M

st. His concern was inside the room. A stand against the wall was littered with bits of shining mechanism. An

u came to call Bailey in the morning a

uched," said the cle

took on the slow drawl of boredom. One might have thought that he had lost all interest in

ft here he hadn't any i

ollow you,

boy doesn't abandon a brand-new fad when he runs away. It isn't in boy nature. No, he was takin

met

up. None of the hundreds of people who turned o

is t

f an hour for taking apart the reel. I don't believe he'd have been longer a

ard him go out of

ones, indicating certain marks on the sill. Swinging his feet over, h

lightning ro

he said presently. "Bailey's footprints where he landed are deeply

the evening of Bailey's disappearance. About nine o'clock the wind shift t

ear on these poin

n mind to write a paper on the me

how soon after the meteor's fall, the

as in full blaze within

? Five min

Certainly not

liar." drawled Average Jones. "Pa

at res

soaked by a three-day rain bu

e friction and heat of the meteori

hat. However, to turn to other matters-" He swung himself over the edge of the roof and went briskly down the li

ots in the direction of the barn.

Jones sat meditating a few

pot where your son's

ome tim

e was

mile to the east of the Tuxa

y from the Tuxall

o across the fields and through the

an old roadwa

ore to join Boston Pik

is roadway were your

a few

racks in th

tracks and being surprised, bec

es might have been tossed from a passing vehi

But I can see no ground

oad, in this direct

pening from the Tuxall fiel

y. Do you know

He is a recent

bly want to make his

is precious meteor, and guards the ruins of

eresting study. Meantime, I'd lik

tice brought out a coa

n which is sold by the h

ese the visitor examin

ticularly thick on one

s attenti

ing wet on the shore,"

nti

it's ground or pressed in. Has any one t

hrough th

frowned. "Fi

f, some odds and ends of string-oh, a

nature of th

decipherable enough to judge from. I remember some flamboyant adjectives ref

. Most of these had been crossed out in favor of other words or sentences, which in turn had been "scratched." Evidently the writer had been toilfully experime

scientific

he end this line was the legend "3 Feet High." "Verita Visitor," appeared below, and beyond it, what seemed to be the word "Void." And near the foot of the sheet the student of all t

io, and there was a strange expressio

r-waste-basket." he drawled

one, I believe. There w

shoes of Bailey's," ask

e so. In the a

bring th

oat, tried it on and buttoned it across his chest without difficulty; then thrust his arm into the coat which went with it, and wormed his way, effortfully, partly into that. He laid

ese do?"

f a glance. "Yes," he said indifferently, and

" cried the clergyman,

lied the visitor, holding h

tice, "that is the tr

act

not going to

N

e place where the

n't t

g up the attempt to disco

hat becam

rt. His lips parted. No sound came from them. Average Jones carefully

e was injured and unconscious. They still have him. Incidentally, he has seriously interfe

heaven, Mr. Jones," he cried, "tell

you the one until I can find out the other. Be sure of one thing, Bailey is in no

nd a few days later, a sheet of letter-paper bearing the busi

ype for sensat

elivery in two

ourt Temple

number of printing shops. But, as the answers came in to Average Jones, he put them aside, because none of the seekers for business was able to "show samples." Finally there came a lette

single-letter, hand-made type of just the size you want. Only pa

ous M to the admira

e Jones. "I'd like to see ot

produced a s

if you please; a

spicion. "You appear to be selecting the

e-er-legend, 'Marvelous Man-Like

he Farleys,"' sa

to do ascensions with firework trimmings, didn't th

yed himself. "This type is decidedly a private-even a secret-order. I

a letter left here for th

f an epistle, which should be sufficiently imperative without being too alarming. Ha

do so," he suggested. "I've asked the Farleys for a

e following afternoon Mr. Prentice trembling in the anteroom of the Ad-Visor's. With the briefest word of greeting Average Jones led him into his private office, where a clear-eyed boy, with

e couple. The woman was plumply muscular. Her attractive face was both defiant and uneasy. Behind her strode a wiry man of forty. His

verend Mr. Prentice," said A

he wagon?" asked th

dmitted the w

upon Farley. "Why did you want to

to," replied that g

Average Jones. "The principal acto

Mrs. Farley's been awful good to me, takin' care of me an' all that.

ng us. Now, Bailey, you were working over

on't know anythin

orgotten that you were out of the world then. Well, about nine o'clock of the night you g

, Mr. Jones, how do yo

ounter-questioned Average Jones with a smile. "And it must have been s

shot up from the ground. Then it spread a little. Then

ot careless with the oil,

Farley with an oath. "It wa

, "has left for parts unknown, so the Harwick authori

e Reverend Mr. Prent

, to continue. You ran across the fields to the Tuxall place and went around-let me see; the wind had shifted to th

the boy in measured tones. "Wh

returned the Ad-Visor with a chuckl

omething alive tied u

turned Average Jones, "though

hile Mr. and Mrs. Farley were workin' over

enturer! And wh

nd jerkin' at it, tryin' to get away. Pretty soon, Mr. and Mrs. Farley came almost under me. He says: 'Is Tuxall all ready?' and she says: 'He thinks we ought to wait half an hour. The street'll be full of folks then. Then he s

ailey's abrupt and informal arrival, were in a quandary. Here was an inert boy on their hands. He

d the Reverend

e might have seen and heard before he made his hasty descent. He might

ld was their plan?"

come to at any moment and ruin everything. So they worked at top speed, and left the final performance to Tuxall. In their excitement they forgot to find out from their accomplice who Bailey was. Consequently, they found themselves presently driving across country with an unknown and und

ll," said Farley glumly. "

emplated the mathematical

stcoat?"

at the outrageous

t it las

with the pepper-and-sa

Farley in sudde

s clothes, which are of the same common pattern,

a card in it, did I?

ng just

you remember, you couldn't find the rou

It was in that vest-pocket. But

everend Peter Prentice, "w

he waste-basket," drawled

ot Bailey's c

. His waistcoat may have fallen out

t work in the dark, and arson, and a mys

much scorched, and with a peculiar carving on it, which

that," said Farl

e inferred it. But it's

disgustedly. "I wish we'd never he

" cried the clergyman. "Will some

Average Jones. "Th

connec

ng a flaming 'dropper.' About the time the 'dropper' reached the earth Tuxall lighted up his well-oiled barn. All Harwick, having had its attention attracted by the explosion, and seen the portent with its own eyes, believed that a

ed the mini

d-living, senti

hould

ted to know, thou

ainly. Any

attested evidence of human, or approximately human, life in other spheres. It was a big stake that

out big prints," said

rospects of a rich harvest from public curiosity and credulity. Tuxall planted a big rock under the barn, fixed it up approp

cried the

d undoubtedly find on the boulder underneath it a carving resembling a human form, a hoax more ambitious than

lf-day's visit to Harwick?" asked th

reading of the 'gibberis

, he sent the loose end of it wheeling across the floor, until it lay, fully outs

MAN-LIKE

Only one trade is irretrievably committed to and indubitably hall-marked by alliteration, the circus trade. You'll recall that Farley insensibly fell into the habit even in his advertisement; 'lost lad,' 'retained for ransom' and 'Mortimer Morley.' Therefore I had the combination circus poster, an alleged meteor which burned a barn in a highly suspicious manner, and an apparently purposeless kidnapping. The inf

nviction, "I believe you'r

erage Jones could acknowledge this flattering surmise, "you said that stra

Bailey was, and had to advertise him, i

re two of them?" p

anting' of the clothes on the shore; the other, mor

you know that Bailey was

g after, he'd have revealed his identity to his

pause. Then the w

and now

s got away. Mr. Prentice has recovered his so

n," said the woman, as he pause

ate glance at the sprawling leg

replied. "An ad which never has been publish

door, and Mr. Algernon Spofford

t of amazement. "You've found him!" cried. "Hello,

im and them," repl

ce department from the information window here to the postmaster-g

timer Morley; in less private life Mr. Tim Fa

," exploded Mr. Spofford. "How

with a smile, "that when rats leave a sinking ship or a burning

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