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Michael

Chapter 5 5

Word Count: 7160    |    Released on: 28/11/2017

ow to remind him of the hour of their train's departure the next morning, turned back into the room to begin his packing. That was not an affair that would take much time, but since,

tertain the idea of sleep, he drew one of the stiff, plush-covered arm-chairs to the

ed himself naked to music; he had found a friend. Any one of these would have been sufficient to saturate him, and they had all, in the decrees of Fate, c

incapable at games. Walled up in this fortress of himself, this gloomy and forbidding fastness, he had altogether failed to find the means of access to others, both to the normal English boys among whom his path lay, and also to his teachers, who, not unnaturally, found him sullen and unresponsive. There was no key among the rather limited bunche

forms. And all the time, like an owl on his solitary perch, he had gazed out lonelily, while the other birds of day, too polite to mock him, had merely passed him by. One such, it is true-his cousin-had sat by him,

ad understood a good deal; she had pointed out with her unerr

only pointed out the disabilities he made for himself. She did not know what he was capable of in the way of happiness. But he tho

lightenment that had come to him during this last week, there had come no gleam of what that simplest and commonest aspect of human nature meant. He had never felt towards a girl what that round-faced German boy felt. He was not sure, but he thought he disliked girls; they meant nothing to him, an

s, and two companions-and he played the role of sour gooseberry to his cousin, who, with the utmost gaiety, had proved himself completely equal to the inauspicious occasion, and had drank indisc

was to be passed, not idly, sitting under trees, but in the eager pursuit of its unnumbered paths. It was that aspect of it which, as he knew so well, his father, for instance, would never be able to understand. To Lord Ashbridge's mind, music was vaguely connected with white waistcoats and opera glasses and large pink carnations; he was congenitally incapable of viewing it in any other light than a diversion, something that took place between nine and eleven o'clock in the evening, and in smaller quantities at church on Sunday morning. He would undoubt

efore that the vast proportion of music came from Germany, that almost all of that which meant "music" to him was of German origin; but that was a very diffe

mply for that reason; to-night, with the curtain of the last act of Parsifal, it had ceased to exist again. It was not that a patriotic desire to honour one of the national heroes in the home where he had been established by the mad genius of a Bavarian king that moved them; it was because for the moment that Baireuth to Germans meant Germany. From Berlin, from Dresden, from Frankfurt, from Luxemburg, from a hundred towns those who were most typically German, whether high or low, rich or poor, made their joyous pilgrimage. Joy and solemnity, exultation and t

er to the tremendous riddles of consciousness; that could lift you, though tearing and making mincemeat of you, to the serenity of the Pisgah-top, whence was seen the promised land. It, in itself, was reality; and the door-keeper who admitted you into that enchanted realm was the spirit of Germany. Not France, with its little, morbid shiverings, and its me

flower, and rising into sunlight above the mists of his own self-occupied shyness, which had so darkly beset him all life long. He had given the best that he knew of himself to his cousin, but all the time there had never quite been absent from his mind his sense of inferiority, a sort of aching wonder why he could not be more like Francis, more careless, more capable of enjoyment, more of a normal type. But with Falbe he was able for the first time to forget himself altogether; he had met a man who did not recall him to himself, but took him c

their series, in the woods above the theatre, and Michael, no longer blurting out his spe

certain amount about harmony already; I have been mugging it up for the last three years. But I must

t attending

mething to be done with a piano, if you know how to do it. I can st

he black notes?

The rest are white

el la

drivelling," he said,

ng, Michael. I was thinki

rea

all

out my career. I want to do something, and these large hands are really rat

hesi

nd to advise you to try the Jew's harp, and see if you can get it out of your teeth. I'm not mocking you; I fancy you know that. But some people, however keenly and rightly they feel, cannot bring their feelings out through their fingers. Others can; it is a special gift. If you haven't got it, I can't teach you anything, and there is no use in wasting your tim

" said

t. That's why, all those years, I have hated giving lessons. If one has to, as I have had to, one must take any awful miss with a pigtail, and make a sham piani

turned

han I can bear. Isn't there a piano in your ro

capable of playing-at least, whether I think yo

hed a piano for a w

hether you've touche

th while, and they found it waiting for them by the theatre. There was still time to drive to Falbe's lodging and get through this crucial ordeal before th

," he said; "but that d

I to play?" a

ing yo

be right, and the knowledge turned his fingers stiff. From the few notes that Falbe had struck he guessed on what sort of instrument his ordeal was to take place, and yet he knew that Falbe himself would have been able to convey to him the sense that he could play, though the pian

, and heard it ja

not fair

!" said

The notes he knew perfectly; he had believed also that he had found a certain conception of it as a whole, so that he could make somet

ungainly hands had all the gentleness and self-control that strength gives, and the finger-filling chords were as light and as fine as the settling of some poised bird on a bough. In the last few lines of the prelude a deep bass note had to be struck at the b

over to the piano, stru

but you made me think it wasn't. . .

king the dumb note, as if to m

t, you know, is wrong from beginning to end, and you mustn't m

me into his life, now excitedly plunging down the foam of swift-flowing rapids in the exhilaration of his newly-found liberty, now proceeding with steady current at the thought of the weeks of unremitting industry at a beloved task that lay in front of him. He could form no definite image out of these which should represent his ordinary day; it was al

of his friend accepting him as a pupil. He did not intend that this rejection should make the smallest difference to his aim, but he knew that he would start his work under the tremendous handicap of Falbe not believing that he had it in him to play, and under the disappointment of not enjoying the added intimacy which work with and for Falbe would give him. Then he had engaged in this tussle with refractory notes till he quite lost himself in what he was playing, and thought no more either of Falbe

bandoned now that the pleasure of hospitality was his. He engaged at once the best double suite of rooms that the hotel contained, two bedrooms with bathrooms, and an admirable sitting-room, looking spaciously out on to the square, and with brusque decision silenced

day of their stay there, and Falbe, read

le of days, and he has come to be present at Tristan this evening. He's travelled thr

up with some

ything?" he asked. "He has stay

isit is a widely-advertised incognito. That's

my father dreadfully if he knew. The Kaiser looks o

f the inimitable break

ad out a steam launch and careered up and down the river till six, asking a thousand questions about the tides and the currents and the navigable channels. Then he lectured us on the family portraits

once," remarked Falbe, with

olitely, "because on that occasion

und like the second

efore," sa

of national airs proclaimed the august presence. He held an informal review of certain Bavarian troops not out for manoeuvres in the morning, visited the sculpture gallery and pinacothek in the afternoon, and when Hermann and Michael went up to the theatre they found rows of soldiers drawn up, and inside unusual decorations over a section of stalls which ha

ither to the right nor left, stern and almost frowning, with no shadow of a smile playing on the tightly-drawn lips, above which his moustache was brushed upwards in two stiff protuberances towards his eyes. He was there just then not to see, but to be seen, his incognito was momentarily i

looked this way and that, as if, incognito again, he was looking for friends in the house. Once Michael thought that he looked rather long and fixedly in his direction, and then, putting down his glass, he said something to one of the officers, this time clearly pointing towards Michael. Then

not say that it was more gigantic than The Ring, more human than the Meistersingers, more emotional than Parsifal, but it was utterly and wholly different to anything else he had ever seen or conjectured. Falbe, he himself, the thronged and silent theatre, the Emperor, Munich, Germany, were all blot

e said, "what ye

e la

than you know yet,

clanking down the gangway next them.

hink?" he said in

roused

" he

me the honour to desire you to

said

e stood aside for Michael to pa

idor behind he j

r father, and he saw you immediately he came into the theatre. If you will permit me, I would advise you to bow, but not very low, respecting His Majesty's incognito, to seat yourse

down the steps to t

ghest," he said, and

it as he took it, felt himself seized in the famous grip of ste

uld not resist the pleasure of a little chat with you about

advised, instantly took it, though the

good health, Your Ma

ur mother also. I well remember my last visit to his house above the tidal estuary at Ashbri

mself to the house, was now never in repose for a moment. He kept turning his head, which he carried very upright, this way and that as he spoke; now he would catch sight of some

at Michael, to the answers to which (there was scarcely time for more than a monosyllable in reply) he listened with an eager and a suspicious attention. They were concerned at first with all sorts of subjects: inquired if Michael had been at Baireuth, what he was going to do after t

ands the culture of the Fatherland, even as it always gives me pleasure to see the English here, strengthening by the study of the arts the bonds

es, was eager to hear what politicians thought about the state of things in Ireland, made specific inquiries about the Territorial Force, asked abou

in the Guards, I

t resigned my commis

ave many of your off

usic, Your Majes

Berlin? You ought to spend a couple of months

y to one of his staff

at is it?

Bergmann

aves to know whether it is Your Majesty'

iser l

hey wish to cut short my conversation with you. Yes, Bergmann, we

s neighbour was never still for a single moment. Now he would shift in his chair, now with his hand he would beat ti

hat is most effective. The shawl-observe the beautiful lines into which the shawl falls as she waves it. That is wonderful-a very impressive entry. Ah,

gle, which reminded

bravo! bravo! Wunderschon! Yes, enter King Mark from his hunting. Very fine. Say I was particularly p

eror rose and agai

et my message to your father; and take my advice and come to Berlin

nto the Herr-Director, who had b

not having been able to attend very closely to the second act of Tristan was negligible compared to the cause that had occasioned it. It was possible for the ordinary mortal to see Tristan over and over again, but to converse with the Kaiser was a thing outside the range of the average man. And again in this interval, as during the act itself, Mi

oo much fo

to Aegir' this morning, and delicately remarked that you had heard it

me head, and gesticula

which is summed up all Germany. It is as if I had spoken to Rule Britannia herself. Would you not be interested? There is no one in the world who is to his country what the Kaiser

ss of wine and dran

nd if the Chancellor does not agree with the Emperor, the Emperor can appoint one who does. That is what it comes to; that is why he is as vast

el la

tion," he said. "I don't picture

an impressiv

n at each other's throats over the business at Agadir. He h

them, anyhow,

who are jealous at our power. The whole Fatherland is a sword in his hand, wh

asked Michael. "

hesi

, "but the enemy potentially is any who

nstinctively, the Emperor's great curiosity to be informed on Engli

y didn't come to Munich to talk politi

e no

e remarked. "You are the most happy-go-luck

said Michael. "He was extreme

that," said

nths in Berlin in the winter," added M

e sm

d, "since that will mean y

hael, smiling back; "though I can say

e go

hat you were Kaiser

ael. "I should not have

hly English as Falbe certainly was in his ordinary, everyday life, and that yet, at the back of this there should lie so profound a patriotism towards another country, and so profound a reverence to its ruler. In his general outlook on life, his friend appeared to be entirely of one blood with

dea was purely hypothetical; he did not, in fact, look forward to such a bouleversement as being a possible contingency. But with Falbe it was different; quite a small cause, like the sight of the Rhine at Cologne, or a Bavarian village at sunset, or the fact of a friend having talked with the Em

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