Cecilia, Volume 3 (of 3)

mile of Mr Arnott's house, the postilion, in turning too suddenly from the turnpike to the cross-road, overset the carriage. The accide

hat went forward, till she heard her footman call for help. She then hastily advanced to enquire what was the matter, and found that the passenger who had lent his ai

ed to his own home in the chaise, while she and the maid wal

with any excuse, instantly related the adventure she had met with on the road, which quieted their curiosity, by turning their attention to her personal safety. They ordered a room to be prepared for her, entreated her to go to rest with all speed, and postpone any further account till the next day. With this request she most gladly complied, happy to be spared the embarrassment of enquir

y refused, she was thus suddenly arrived without any; and she was still more eager to talk of herself, a

to rehearse her own complaints, soon forgot that she had asked any, and, in a very short time, was

d so unaccountable, from an object that no discouragement could make him think of with indifference, had been a subject to him of conjecture and wonder that had revived all the hopes and the fears which had lately,

ight: Mrs Harrel, also, saw that she looked ill, but attributed it to the fatigue and fright of the precedi

ut half a mile off. And then, partly to gratify her own humanity, and partly to find any other employment for herself and friends than uninteresting conversation, she proposed that they should all walk to the poor man's habitation, and offer him

sband, and was told that he

he; "I hope then he has got the better

n, "met with the accident, it was John

all went, and saw him

, and, without speaking, began to l

, "that you are so much hurt. Have

er, of his eye, which the next instant he fixed upon the ground, startl

moment how little he would be obliged to her for betraying him, and sufferin

s over, she enquired how long John had belonged

with them a week, and that he went

t sincerely at beholding in so melancholy an occupation a young man of such talents and abilities; she wished much to assist him, and began considering by what means it might be done, when

is hat in his hand, and his whole air i

companied by her friends: but when they came up to each other, she checked her desir

ness and distress, he exclaimed, with a forced smile, "Is it possible Miss Beverley can deign to notice a poor miserable day-labourer such as I am? how will she be justified in the beau monde, when even the sight of such a

rits so good; yet my own, I must confess, are not

ich so long I pursued in vain, but which always eluded my grasp, till the instant of despair arrived, when, slackening my pace, I gave it up as a phantom. Go from me, I cried, I will be cheated no more! thou airy bubble! thou fleeti

ve to Mrs Harrel and Mr Arnott the utmost surprize; his appearance, and the account they ha

ss," said Cecilia, "nothing, at last,

ed he, "it is Labou

efore Mrs Harrel and Mr Arnott, and hurt to keep him standing, though he leant upon a stick; she told him, ther

his sister would entreat Miss Beverley

tantly asked Belfield to cal

th much difficulty formed, when all my future tranquility depends upon adhering to it. The worthlessness of m

e then," said Ceci

othing to gain or to lose? When first, indeed, I saw you, I involuntarily shrunk; a weak shame for a moment seized me, I felt fallen and debased, and I wished to avoid you: but a little recollection brought me ba

r him, "if you will not visit us, will you at least permit

where you may be seated yourselves; but for me, I h

e cottage, which was now empt

uire whether Lord Vannelt is acquainted with your retirem

surprised. I would have quitted his house, if no other,

Cecilia; "I had hoped he would have kno

rcumstances excites nothing but derision. Those who give the offence, by the worthy few may be hated; but those who receive it, by the world at large will be despised. Conscious of this, I disdained making any appeal; myself

ecilia, "to adopt, but living with Lord

ds who would with pleasure have presented me to some other nobleman; but my whole heart revolted against leading that kind of life, and I would not, therefore, idly rove from

ere tedious and disgusting; the army, too, but there found my mind more fatigued with indolence, than my body with action; general dissipation had then its turn, but the expence to

but in a quicker voic

inally destined,-but my education had ill suited me to such a destination, and th

I looked another way not to be seen by him, and the change in my dress since I left his Lordship's made me easily pass unnoticed. He had rode on, however, but a few yards, before, by some accident or mismanagement, he had a fall from his horse. Forgetting all my caution, I flew instantly to his assistance; he was bruised, but not otherwise hurt; I helpt him up, and he leant 'pon my arm; in my haste of enquiring how he had fared, I called him by his name. He knew me, but looked surprised at my appearance; he was speaking to me,

ident confirmed; I saw it was only made for the great and the rich;-poor, therefore, and low, what had

on let her hear more: I then paid off my lodgings, and 'shaking the dust from my feet,' bid a long adieu to

upon nothing but a total seclusion from society: but my slow method of travelling

hope the imagination? where the past has left nothing but resentment, and the future opens only to a dismal, uninteresting void? No stranger to life, I knew human nature could not exist on such terms; still less a stranger to books, I respect

ity of imitation has ever been as much my scorn as servility of dependence; I resolved, therefore, to strike out somethin

. I am constantly, not capriciously employed, and the exercise which benefits my health, imperceptibly raises my spirits in despight of adversity. I am removed from all temptation, I h

curiosity to hear him had sprung wholly from her desire to assist him, and she had expected from his story to gather some hint upon which her services might be offered. But none had occurr

which you seem to regard as conducive to your contentment, nor remonstrate at the step you have taken, since you have been led to it by choice, not necessity:

taken against mental fatigue, will secure me from repentance, or any desire of change; for it is not

ainted with this change in

o often lost; but I will not abuse their affection, nor suffer them again to be slaves to my caprices, nor dupes to their own delusive expectations. I have sent them word I am happy; I have not yet

indeed so sweet? and can you seriously derive ha

t. Mental fatigue is overpowered by personal; I toil till I require rest, and that rest which nature, not luxury demands, leads not to idle meditation, but to sound, heavy, necessary sl

have we so many complaints of the sufferings of the poor, and

offered nothing else!-had they seen an attentive circle wait all its entertainment from their powers, yet found themselves forgotten as soon as out of sight, and perceived themselves avoided when no longer buffoons!-Oh had they known and felt provocations such as these, how gladly would their resentful spirits turn from the wh

your present situation, as even to think it o

in chewing to the world, glory still more in shewing to myself, that those whom I cannot but despise I

uld I ask again, why in quitting Lord Vannel

e. I believe, indeed, he never meant to offend me; but I was offended the more that he should think me an object to receive indignity without knowing it. To have had this pointed out to him, would have been at once mortifying and vain; for delicacy, like taste, can onl

ement are rare, they yet exist; why, then, remove y

I will accept no gifts if offered with contumely? Who will listen to such an account? who will care for my misfortunes, but as they may humble me to his service? Who will hear my mortifications, but to say I deserve

ore than justice to acknowledge, that hard-heartedness to distress is by no means the fault of the present

pirit calls for consolation even more than his ruined fortune for repair, how is his struggling soul, if superior to his fate, to brook the ostentation of patronage, and the insolence of condesce

any longer, but expressing her best wishes, without venturing to hint at her services, she arose, and they all took their leave;-Belfield hastening, as they went, to ret

ng him from a life of such hardship and obscurity; but what to a man thus "jealous in honour," thus scrupulous in delicacy, could she propose, without more risk of offence, than

nts, and striking manners considered, might occasion even in himself a misconstruction o

ed no season for her liberality, which she yet resolved