eve that silence w

m, and she had nothing to contribute. It was her hiding place during heartbreak, disappointme

s were th

recious scroll. He barely cried; his presence was oddly calming, as if he kn

ed enough for

pered prayers. She cried because Nelson wouldn't stop calling. She cried because sometimes, despite

came so forcefully she dropped the spoon into the pot. Her kne

to be anyone's mot

ned, and Raymond was watching her-eyes wi

and healed ins

e a series of fi

er, she called the hospital in tears and showed up in the emergency room for what turned out to be mild teething symptoms.

n to wri

f the chaos. Now she wrote about Raymond-his breathing patterns, his mile

s, she began writ

d. I bleed, but I carry. I cry, but I hold joy in my arm

metimes, she wanted to understand her

two months after

a handwritten note: "Forgive me.

it carefully into a drawer, right

dn't r

an unknown number. She didn't

s she would assert herself. But now, she didn't want confrontation. She wanted peace. N

orehead and whispered, "You will n

ar p

de jollof rice that reminded her of her father's slightly burnt version. She played Fela l

steps that made her heart pound

y!" she'd cal

e toward her, grin

ard her, as if he knew she was the

with her journal. It had somehow fallen from the bed, a

rom his hands, and smiled. "One da

cla

ughed. Rea

he ache hadn't disappeared, but it had dulled. Love had quieted it-

aled. But she

birthday, she visite

eral. Guilt clenched her chest as

name is Raymond, like you. And he laughs just

grave and let the w

ose wrong. I broke. But I'm h

acing a flower he'd plucked n

randpa," she

mumbled

we

from pain-but

lit a candle be

o a fresh pa

ar

y and grief in the same hands. You loved when yo

no longe

her is y