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A Mere Accident

Chapter 5 No.5

Word Count: 6859    |    Released on: 30/11/2017

rd, under the evergreen oaks where the young rooks are swinging; out on the mundane swards into the pleasure ground; a rosery and a rockery; th

ged through the pleasure grounds by the pale yellow of the laburnums, by the great yellow of the berberi

limes shivers, and the young rooks

lilac, and the striped awning of the tennis seat t

pale yell

e trunks come out black upon the cloth of gold, and the larks fly out of the gold,

arks nestle in, and fly out of the gold. It was May time, and the air was bright with buds and summer bees. She was dressed in white, and the shadow of the st

May time, but his was awake with unconscious love, and he yielded to her, to the perfume of the garden, to the absorbing sweetness of the moment. He was no longer John Norton. His being was part of the May time; it had gone forth and had mingled with the colour of the fields and sky; with the lif

h the sunlight on your hair seem more blossom-like than any flower. I wonder what flower I should compare you to.... S

speak like that before; I thou

narrow circle of the waist, cambric fluted to the little wrist, reedy translucid hands; cambric falling outwards and flowing like a great white flower over the green sward, over the mauve stocking, and the little shoe set firmly. The ear is as a rose leaf, a fluff of light hair trembles on the curving nape, and the head is crowned

in others he had felt, and still felt, so much scorn, that in the tumult of his loathing he could not gain the calm of mind necessary for an examination of conscience. He could not look into his mind with any

he could never quite forget the defiling thought; it would always remain with him, and the consciousness of the stain would preclude all possibility of that refining happiness, that attribute of cleanliness, which he now knew

us innocence, and he was sorry; and he remembered her youth and her beauty, and he let his

no dulces fac,

sus, surge fac

s vatorum est g

ba, he opened his Bible and turned over the pages, reading a phrase here and there until he had passed from story and psalm to the Song of

is was his favourite attitude) he looked in the fire fixedly. He was ravaged by emotion. The

gh the picture of his future life rose at his invocation it did not move him as heretofore, nor did the scenes he evoked of conjugal grossness and platitude shock him to the extent he had expected. The moral rebellion he succeeded in exciting was tepid, heartless, and ineffective, and he was not moved by hate or fear until he remembered that God in His infinite goodness had placed him for ever out of the temptation which he so earnestly sought to escape from. Kitty was a Protestant. In a pang of despair, windows and organ collapsed like cardboard;

on Sunday, but you would

ay is not

miseries and trials of the world. A Protestant, you know, may believe pretty nearly as little or as much as he likes, whereas in our church eve

a little astonished at this sudden outburst. "I feel quite happy and safe. I know that

terpretation of the Church is ...

nce he asked himself if he, in his own house, had a right to s

f I break down I will ask father." And as if to emphasise her intention,

nce, for in the discussion as to how it could b

tment which seemed to permeate and flow through him with the sweetness of health returning to a convalescent on a spring day. He closed his eyes, and his thoughts came and went like soft light and shade in a garden close; his happiness was a part of himself, as fragrance is inherent in the summer time. The evil of the last days had fallen from him, and the reaction was equivalently violent. Nor was he conscious of the formal resignation he was now making of his dream, nor did he think of the distasteful load of marital duties with which he was going to burden himself; all was lost in the vision of beautiful comp

e new conditions did not fail to frighten him, and he looked back with passionate regret on his abandoned dreams. But his nature was changed, abstention he kne

love him. The young grey light of the eyes would be fixed upon him; she would speak her sorrow, and her thin hands would hang by her side in the simple attitude that was so peculiar to her. And he mused willingl

looked at him; he recalled every gesture and every movement with wonderful precision, and then he lapsed into a passionate consideration of the general attitude of mind she evinced towards him. He arrived at no conclusion, but these meditations we

es float, and the wood-pigeons come at eventide to drink; in the greenhouse with its live glare of geraniums, where the great yellow cat, so soft and beautiful, springs on Kitty's shoulder, rounds its back, and purring, insists on caresses; in the large clean st

l he was very happy. The days were full of sunshine and Kitty, and he mistook her light-heartedness for affection. He had begun to look upon her as his certain wife, although no words had been spoken that would suggest such a possibility. Outside of his imagina

, "You must sometimes feel a little lonely here .

Norton says she ought to make five pounds a year on each. Sometimes we lose a swarm or two, and then Mrs Norton is so cross. We were out for hours with the gardener the other day, but we could do no good; we could not get them out o

their feet; the rooks were flying about the elms. At the end of the garden there was a circle of fig trees. A silent place, and John vowed he wou

e is fully o

s; we pay visits. You never pay visits; y

ent the other day

ly because he talks to

ce I have finished my book I s

hat will

nting. I have told a dealer to look o

d told her that he had given the order for a couple

in again till next November. You will

or a racquet and shoes,

he flannels; you might play in the Carmelite's habit which came

change your

o suddenly as you. Then you ar

it depends on

nces?" said Kit

ow, and in an instant the occasion had passed. He hated himself for his weakness. The weary burden of his love lay still upon him, and the torture of utterance sti

a beauty? st

ds made a picture in the exquisite clarity of the English morning,-in the homeliness of the English garden, with tall hollyhocks, espalier apple trees, and one labourer digging amid the cabbages. Jo

the park, shadowy in the twilight

, John, that you could care

why,

, without the faintest hesitation or shyness, "we always thought you hated girls. I know I used to tea

do you

laughe

mise not

romi

heir first

ou were sitting by the fire reading, that

at least not for a long time. I wish my mother w

t what I have told you. If you do, y

romi

er your dislike to girls. I saw you talking a long while with Miss Orme the other da

eed she

was,

u w

ce that John in a sudden access of fear said, "We had better

roject had grown impossible to him, and he felt he could not embrace it again, with any of the old enthusiasm at least, until he had been refused by Kitty. There were moments when he almost yearned to hear her say that she could never love him. But in his love and religious suffering the thought of bringing a soul home to the true fold remained a fixed light; he often looked t

ested that they should climb to the top of Toddington Mount, and view the i

s glossed with, the ordinary passion of life. Both are like children, infinitely amused by the colour of the grass and sky, by the hurry of the startled rabbit, by the prospect of the long walk; and they taste already the wild charm of the downs, seeing and hearing in imagination its man

thinking of the Dover cliffs as seen in mid Ch

never been out of England, but the Brighto

de-the downs rise in a gently

and Worthing. Oh! it is beautiful! I often go for a walk there

roperty; it extends right into th

here we are going. But aren't you a littl

. They had walked three miles, and Thornby Place and its elms were now vague in th

the downs from Sho

n eight miles; you don't

nd walking on the downs is not like walking o

really

e to get so tired that I co

ld car

imb. Speaking of the De

you never heard the leg

x, and I used to hate the place; I

suits any more, because th

don't approve of priests meddling in

Now let's try and find a place where we can sit do

; there is no gorse here.

spot that had been chosen for her, "you do astonis

tell i

o tell it in ordinary words,

y! In who

eldest of the girls, and they made

should have thought she was so c

clever; but she doesn

ecite

remember it all. You won'

romi

ND OF ST

tood on a poi

ge of the gran

feet, like a

he expanse of t

he Saint,''twas t

range of hil

he use of praye

flood the vill

no doubt, these

h a thing I d

' saint, was a

bland and ben

pproach of the

of his supper,

ng fa

rcely p

s way, when he sa

tall a

saw fro

il in full di

e wanting

orns and

ere a fully co

heart of

ce turne

shone with re

lo,

respassi

, 'To me it is

the devil, he's

spade a

e,' said

e no power o'er

ow you

first mo

ver Poynings, shal

ve you l

Saint, 'by

u please, only say

devil,

sporting

to you

ke such

now stands, shall be

the Saint, '

penitent

'll come to

cannot retu

won ere the f

ascension

re will be the

e hill with a f

a cell which s

the door, and

blessing and

e saw a tear

y maiden of

eheld him, turn

er features a n

she said, 'I ha

ave confessed si

my vows-'tis a

u, oh father, f

cannot subdue

h father! an

ghter,' repli

is ever to do

a time when I

my passion, and w

nance

t kneel

hich will n

es say th

will be a

you'll ent

hour d

he hou

me of midni

troke of

taper

nce will the

cell, and he

Nick on the to

'clock, and t

k of the Devil

rather fatigu

t little for

ick crash throug

went over and

eald like the cr

hed the first

, praying, rev

hell!' the Old

terrible stit

ard,' said the S

r dyke a heap sm

the Devil, 'I've

'll trim up my

s looking pro

the hours wer

her a

amp at

edles a

hair to

ble an

horns to

vanquished, I'

be finished er

r bet, 'twill b

nd again was the

th a most u

end of the d

of an awful r

began his

quished!' exclai

torrents of fl

the Saint, 'is hi

pect when the D

happened, which c

swear; when the fou

came rolling a h

ite out

tempered

ss of stone whiz

again, till a

e more hour-the f

sked the Saint, 'A

while I had

a bit he worke

ng passed, he was s

d and h

this a

ere awful, but t

ful rag

mon de

sed words that c

shaken a

e of hi

orked on until m

s turned for the

is pick was stuck

ed St Cuthman, '

e dyke! Leave your

work 'tween su

glimmer of

was yo

sensele

ed with sulph

eceived by St

d the Devil, 'in

soul, for I've lo

St Cuthman, 'F

pproaches th

flames where y

e peaceful Sout

an scowled but

of his hoofs re

his dark pinions

Ursula

ling th

n sorrow, stood

over a

rows we

of triumph S

s was th

ever we

e Devil, his sp

you wan

egend, t

the hillock last

rite that. And there are some excellent rhymes in it, 'passed he' rhyming

idea how the farmers enjoyed it. They know the place so well,

ment of it; by the abrupt hills, mysterious now in sunset and legend; by the vast plains so blue and so boundless: out

of silver, my pretty gentleman, and she will tel

they found themselves facing a strong, b

ty, would you like to h

It would be rath

y, full by the way of references to John-of a handsome young man who

hey watched her passing through the furze. The

quite true; I did not da

you mea

in love with you,

hn; it is quite absurd-I

y you will have me; make th

ords always

u will m

ge. When do you want me to ma

will be mine, that you will be mistress of

nt to pull the hou

s no! Say you will be my

"And I may tell my mother of your promis

her, John, but I don't t

d she not

g, "but how funny, was it not, that

but I hadn't the courage; and I might never have f

on the landscape, letting it sink into and fix itself for ever in his mind. Below them lay the great green plain, wonderfully level, and so distinct

house-your house," said John a

nny to hear you

l be your ho

urch will not let you

wretched understanding, and are content to accept the Church as wiser than we. Once man throws off restraint there is no happiness, there is only misery. One step leads to another; if he would be logical he must go on, and before long, for the descent is very rapid indeed, he fi

s, but I heard Mrs Norton

ushed it out. I used to be a Republican too, but I saw what

ll your ideas for

startled, but he answered, "I would

at!

s not r

you much to giv

ome admirable pages of human suffering. "None will ever know how I have suffered," he said sadly. "But now I am

in our Lord Christ who died t

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