A TROUBLED SURVIVOR, A TREANDING DESIRE

NT DA

better" I muttered to myself

ind. The emotions I was going through were too heavy on me. I wanted to curl u

I speak no w

M

My mind has wond

t I allow this thoughts, this poem conversion of min

manner. It was a habit I couldn't stop. Every time I was faced with something I would start analyzing it up until it

th no one to talk to, turn to with my problems, it

y how people thought. I mean I wanted to understand

we never talked about anything pertaining my life or hers for that matter. She was just this shell that expected I do right all the time. The emotions, what inter

el and do what I wanted. Yes she was fighting her battle

could have taken a different path. I mean she saw how much I was suffering, or so I thought; she could have just looked at what went wrong when they groomed because I mean she wasn't perfect nor was she a parent to me; she should have seen that and try to fix but instead she ignored the fact that we had no communication at all and went on with her life. She

being amongst people. I guess I wanted to feel something, love, needed, well I will say at first it was exhausting but since I had grown to an environment where I couldn't talk and thinking was all I did well it got to me and it got easier. I would think about their actions, feel their emotions, but it would take a tol

rn what causes them to act the way they act. I guess I didn't know how to feel certain

how long now! And the moment I start thinking about life and well, people because life is people

ngulfed by slumber th

blems from when I was eleven. At that time, it was understandable, it had been ha

d me were only friends because I was liked by our teacher, and well they reaped benefits from knowing me at that time. Benefits lik

mp

ted Miss Johns

was a long closed chapter I did

to say. My body drifted off to fairyland, a dream I wouldn't want to remember but had to for it was the day of my accomplishment, a day my tormenters got their payment. It