Tom Cringle's Log

is the best foolin

ght, II. i

affron faced tyrants, who wore straw hats with umbrella brims, wide trowsers, and calico jackets, living on pepper pot and land crabs, and drinking sangaree and smoking cigars the whole day; in a word, that all that Bryan Edwards and others had written regarding the civilisation of the West Indies was a fable. But I was agreeably undeceived; for although I did meet with some extraordinary characters, and witnessed not a few rum scenes, yet,

bour of Kingston was full of shipping. I had never before seen so superb a mercantile haven

fore they could pass the narrows to get up to the anchorage at Kingston, they would be blown out of the water by a raking fire from sixty pieces of large cannon on Fort Augusta, which is so situated that they would have to turn to windward for at least half an hour, in a strait which, at the widest, would not allow them to reach beyond musket-shot of the walls. Fortunately, as yet Mr Canning had not called his New World into existence, and the whole of the trade of Terra Firma, from Porto Cavello down to Chagres, the greater part of the trade of the islands of Cuba and San Domingo, and even that of Lima and San Blas, and the other ports of the Pacific, carried on across the Isthmus of Darien

me letters to him, and get his advice as to my future proceedings. Mr Callaloo undertook to be my pilot, striding along a-beam of me, and leaving in his wake

looked as if they had been built of cards, most of them being surrounded with piazzas from ten to fourteen feet wide, gaily painted green and white, and formed by the roofs projecting beyond the brick walls or shells of the houses. On the ground-floor these piazzas are open, and in the lower part of the town, where the houses are built contiguous to each other, they form a covered way, affording a most grateful shelter from the sun, on each side of the streets, which last are unpaved, and more like dry river courses, than thoroughfares in a Christian town. On the floor above, the balconies are shut in with a sort of movable blinds, called "jealousies,' like large bladed Venetian blinds, fixed in

a" quoth my

half a mind to resent; but at the moment there was a bustle in the piazza, and a group of naval officers, am

that boy, L--?" said the

Mr Splinter saved from the Torch; he was

Willoughby sp

e got his promoti

t know it, and began to fear my cruise on shore was all up.-"But I don't look for her from Havanna

invitation to stay some days with him, and drove me home in his ketureen, a sor

em, each carried by one man, while another beats it with his open hands. The coffin was borne along on the heads of two negroes-a negro carries every thing on his head, from a bale of goods to a wine-glass or tea-cup. It is a practice for the bearers, when they come near the house of any one ag

hold play [negro wake] in Spring-path, [the negro burying-ground;] Bediacko say him won't pass 'less you give it." And here they began to spin round more violently than before; but at the instant a drove of bullocks coming along, they got entangled amongst them, and down went body and bearers and all,

introduction, rather posed me, by asking me during dinner, if I would take any thing in the long way with him, which he explained by saying he would be glad to take a glass of small beer with me. This, after a deluge of Madeira, Champagne, and all manner of light wines, was rather trying; but I kept my countenance as well I could. One thing I remember struck me as remarkable; just as we were

, are beautifully polished, and shine like a well-kept dinner table. They are, of course, very slippery, and require wary walking till one gets accustomed to them. The rooms are made exceedingly dark during the heat of the day, according to the prevailing practice in all ardent climates. A

ally as I heard some one say "C

I was distinctly visible to them, although my dazzled optics could as yet distinguish nothing. To add to my pleasurable sensations, I now perceived, from the coldness of the floor, that in MY downfall the catastrophe of my unmentionables had been grievously rent, but I had nothing for it but sitting patiently still amidst the suppressed laughter of the company, until I became accustomed to the twilight, and they, like bright stars, began to dawn on my bewildered senses in all their loveliness, and prodigiously handsome women some of' them were, for the Creoles, so far as figure is concerned, are generally perfect, while beautiful features are not wanting, and my travel ha

-to so suddenly, I split my lower canvass, Mary, and I

you are c

I have split my-ahem. This

and paid my respects to my warm hearted relations. But that petticoat-it could not have been the old woman's, there could have been no such virtue in an old woman's petticoat; no, no, it must either have been a charmed garmen

ppery country, where, I verily believe, the temper of the people, generous though it be in the main, is hotter than the climate, and that, God knows! is soporiferous enough. I was walking through the entrance saloon with my fair cousin on my arm, stepping out like a hero to the opening crash of a fine military band, towards the entrance of the splendid ball-room filled with elegant company, brilliantly lighted up and ornamented with the most rare and beautiful shrubs and flowers, which no

, but you are no

ullion glancing in the corner of my eye at the very moment, my dress-sword by my side, gold buckles in my shoes, and spotless whi

itted in trowsers,

he morning crowding on my recollection; "shiver my timbers! is my fate in th

.-"Hush, Tom; go home an

was the devil to pay; the entrance saloon was crowded with military and naval men, high in oath, and headed by no less a person than a general officer, and a one-armed man, one of the chief civil officers in the place, and who had been a sailor in his youth. I was just in time to see the advance of the combined column to the door of the ball-room

to tie them tightly at the knee with his garters, which gave him the appearance of a Dutch skipper; and in all the consciousness of being now properly arrayed, he walked up to one of the men in

," here he peered through his glass at the substantial suppor

ant la

that he made a grab at his Lilliputian antagonist, but missed him, as he slid away amongst the women like an eel, while his pursuer, brandishing his wooden arm on high, to which I now perceived, for th

nting and screaming, and swearing and threatening, and shying of cards, and fixing of time and place for a cool turn in the morning, it had never been my good

lled and invited me to accompany him on a cruise amongst some of the estates under his management. This was the very thing I desired, and

ail, and urging the noble roan that had me in tow close upon thirteen knots. I had not gone above three miles, however, when the sky in a moment changed from the intense glare of a tropical noontide to the deepest gloom, as if a bad angel had suddenly overshadowed us, and interposed his dark wings between us and the blessed sun; indeed, so instantaneous was the effect, that it reminded me of the withdrawing of the foot-lights in a theatre. The road now wound round the base of a precipitous spur from the Liguanea Mountains, which, instead of melting onto the level country by gradual decreasing undulations,

g the shower, as the wind was with me, I made more sail, pushing the hors

t massa hear de sound of de rain coming along against de win

unto Ahab, there is a sound of abundance of rain, prepare thy chariot, and get thee down, that the rain stop thee no

water-spout) fell from the lower edge of the black cloud, with a strong rushing noise, that increased as it approached to a loud roar like that of

ucketsful on my horse's head, while as yet not one drop had reached me. At this moment the adjutant-general of the forces, Colonel F--, of the Coldstream Guards, in his tandem, drawn by two sprightly blood bays, with his servant,

tremendous, that my horse, trembling from stem to stem, stood dead still; the dusky youth by my side jumped out, and buried his snout in the mud, like a porker in Spain nuzzling for acorns, and I felt more queerish than I would wi

al roar and rumbling reverberation of the report

uck dead the Colonel's servant and leading horse, as he ascended the bank of the ravine, by this time so much swollen, that the body of

; the overseer of the pen, or breeding farm, in the great house as it is called, or mansionhouse of which Mr Fyall resided, and a merry, laughing, intelligent, round, red-faced man, with a sort of Duncan Knockdunder nose, through the wide nostrils of which you could see a cable's length into his head; he was either Fyall's head clerk, or a sort of first lieutenant; these personages and myself composed the pa

was the only speaker, which I found some difficulty in swallowing, until at length, on one thumper bein

chimed in the black servant at my elb

d I, rath

k you call

oon's face-"Why, if

r, at massa ser

nderer; and who is that tall square ma

Cupid,

is carrying away the

y Wee

nd Mammy Weenus

if he had received a blow, and the next moment I

was stable-boy Homer who broke de candle shade on massa right hand, dat one wid de piece broken

nd was disagreeable, but it was unusual; and every now and then a beetle, the size of your thumb, would bang in through the open window, cruise round the room with a noise like a humming-top, and then dance a quadrille with half-a-dozen bats; while the fire-flies glanced like sparks, spangling the folds of the muslin curtains of the bed. The croak of the tree-toad, too, a genteel reptile, with all the usual loveable properties of his species, about the si

gig, with one horse in the shafts, and another hooked on a-breast of him to a sort of studdingsail-bo

ch for ball, and a loose thong across one shoulder, supports, on the opposite hip, a large powder-horn and haversack. This, with a straw hat, and a short gun in their hand, with a sling to be used on a march, completes their equipment-in better keeping with the climate, than the padded coats, heavy caps, tight cross-belts, and ponderous muskets of our regulars. As we drove up to the door, the overseer began to bawl, "Boys, boys!"

fleece, and wears long hair; and his progeny after him, if bred on the hot plains, never assume the wool again. Mr Fyall and I sat down, and then in walked four mutes, stout young fellows, not over-well dressed, and with faces burnt to th

e was called, appeared literally roast

r?" said the overs

drenched him with tr

The knife and fork dropped from my hands. "What can all this mean? is this their boasted kindness to their slaves? One of a family drenched with train-oil and brimstone, another cut for some horrible complaint never heard of before, cal

ll not yield, si

? a stubborn conc

um and water, the rum coming up about an inch in the g

I again stared in wonderment, until I perce

hat was wanted in corpus was made up in legs, indeed he looked like a pair of compasses, buttoned together at the shoulders, and supporting a yellow phiz half a yard long, thatched with a fell of sand

ap on the table with his knuckles, and off started the bookkeepers, like shots o

pital brandy. A new brewage of punch took place, and I found about the small hours that we were all verging fast towards drunkenness, or somethi

ed in the tub, the word was given to hoist away, and we ran him up to the roof, and then belayed the rope round the body of the overseer, who was able to sit on his chair, and that was all. The cold bath, and the being hung up to dry, speedily sobered the American, but his arms being within the sack, he could do nothing for his own emancipation; he kept swearing, however, and entreating, and dancing with rage, every jerk drawing the cord tighter round the waist of the overseer, who, unaware of his situation, thought himself bewitched as he was drawn with violence by starts along the floor, with the chair

at some teal, when we saw our friend the pair of compasses crossing the small bay in his boat, towards his little pilotboat-built schooner, which wa

Yankee rascal, heave-to. Co

I thou as he rose, there was to be no end of him-and s

ss, a'ter last night's work; you hears how I coughs?"-and

you go round that point, and put up the d

augh of derision. "Do you think your birding-piece can touch me here

e to try, you ye

mark for thee," unveiling a certa

at me and smiled, then coolly lifted his long Spanish barrel,

injured part to his head; but the overseer, as soon as he could get off the ground, where he had thrown himself in an uncontroll

ed out of bed to expel the intruder; but the instant my toe touched the ground, it was seized as if by a smith's forceps. I drew it into bed, but the annoyance followed it; and in an agony of alarm and pain, I thrust my hand

spots, and I determined to visit the one which lay on a sunny bank full in view from my window, divided on two sides from the cane pieces by a pr

-the avocada, with its brobdignag pear, as large as a purser's lantern,-the bread-fruit, with a leaf, one of which would have covered Adam like a bishop's apron, and a fruit for all the world in size and shape like a blackamoor's head; while for underwood you had the green, fresh, dew-spangled plantain, round which in the hottest day there is always a halo of coolness,-the coco root, the yam and granadillo, with their long vines twining up the neighbouring trees and shrubs like hop tendrils,-and peas and beans, in all their endless variety

ng the penguin fences, disclosing their delicate flowers in the morning freshness, (all that cl

many of the former I noticed mahogany sideboards and chairs, and glass decanters, while a whole lot of African drums and flutes, and sometimes a good gun, hung from the rafters; and it would have gladdened an Irishman's heart to have seen the adjoining piggeries. Before o

ng and shouting, and playing tricks on each other in the little paths, in all the happy anticipation of a good dinner, and an hour and a half to eat it in

bondage! Oh that some of my well-meaning anti-slavery friend

ccasion. This very interdict excited my curiosity still more; so I rose about midnight, and let myself gently down through the window, and shaped my course in the direction of the negro houses, guided by a loud drumming, which, as I came nearer, every now and then sunk into a low murmuring roll, when a strong bass voice would burst forth into a wild recitative; to which succeeded a loud piercing chorus of female voice

d them, with a conch-shell, which he kept sounding at intervals. Other three negroes kept circling round the outer verge of the circle of women, naked all to their waist cloths, spinning about and about with their hands above their heads, like so many dancing dervishes. It was one of these three that from time to time took up the recitative, the female chorus breaking in after each line. Close

der, you ca

HORUS OF F

tar rise, den we p

US A

a Africa, you s

OR

goat dere, wid a

OR

dere; say, dam rasc

OR

't catch Du

OR

rum, were placed on a small bench that stood close

d shout, or rather yell, clapped their hands three times, and then rushed in

, swinging his body as the women had done, and uttering a low moaning sound, frequ

tching, as I conjectured, the first appearance

with the pork, and t

salt," another large mouthful-"Duppy hate salt too much,"-here he ate it all up, and placed th

ussed this also, placing the empty vessel in the coffin as he had done with the ot

s starting from the sockets, as he peered up into the tree, apparently at some terrible object. I looked up also, and saw a large yellow snake, nearly ten feet long, let itself gradually down directly over the coffin, between me and the bright glare, (the outline of its glossy mottled skin glancing in the strong

a muscle; at length the creature slowly swung its

catch Quaccols Duppy, before him get to Africa, sure as can be. De metody parson say de de

bil, first like a sarpent, den like himself; see him white face behind de tree; see him white face behind de tree;" and then, in the extremity of his fear, he p

he moment they got sight of my uniform, as I ran away, gave chase, and having overtaken me, as I stumbled in the dark path, immediately pinioned

ve-to, or here goes wi

, and that curiosity

e a spy, messmate, and on board you go w

f strength or activity, for a piece of a handspike had been thrust across my back, passing under both of my arms, which were tightly lashed to it, as if I had been trussed for roasting, so that I could no more run, with a chance of escape, than a goose without her pinions. After we left t

if my very thoughts had been audible, the smuggler next me on the

aks to any Niger, or other person we meets, I'll

by carrying me off? Were you to murder me, you would be none the richer; fo

you for your dirty rings, and watch, and mayhap a few dollars,

the landyard, that had been made fast to the middle of the handspike, so violently, that I thought both my shoulders w ere dislocated; for I was fairly checked down on my back, just as you may have seen a pig-merchant on the Fermoy ro

picked up a lot of empty ankers, slung on a long pole, that I fancied I heard, or really did hear, some one snore-oh how I envied the sleeper! At length we reached the beach, where we found two men lying on their oars,

mptly, "Who goes there?" a

tle Wave," wa

e, pulled a stroke or two to give the boat way, now backed wate

ling sea, until we reached the schooner, by this time hauled out into the fairway at the mouth of the cove, where she lay hove shor

ficulty in guessing, from his very out of the way configuration, dark as it

with the overseer when he peppere

ose aboard of the island somewheres hereabouts. I sees through it all, smash my eyes!-

e, pointed to the small dark pit of a companion, for there was no light below, nor indeed anywhere on board, except in the

be up in an hour, I calculate, and then the sea-breeze w

was another person beside poor Quacco, likely to be crammed into a hole before the day broke, and to be carried to Africa too, for what I kne