The Idle Thoughts of An Idle Fellow

writing something clever and original; but for the life of me I can'

ve togive in and take them out--my hands I mean. The chorus to theirobjections is that it is not gentlemanly. I am hanged if I can seewhy. I could understand its not being considered gentlemanly to putyour hands in other people's pockets (especially by the other people),but how, 0 ye sticklers for what looks this and what looks that,

imagined. But let us put our handsin our trousers pockets, and let there be some small change i

in town the peoplecall a bob," I would recklessly spend a penny of it, merely for thesake of having the change, all in coppers, to jingle. You don't feelnearly so hard up with eleven p

equired, which I donot think likely, I can add that I have been a "gentleman connectedwith the press." I have lived

ek and see how much you can put by for clothes andrecreation. You will find out that it is worth while to wait for thefarthing change, that it is worth w

get married. It will

feel a mad desire to drag himoff to the bar of some common east-end public-house and cram asixpenny dinner down his throat--beefsteak pudding, fourpence;potatoes, a penny; half a pint of porter, a penny. The recollectionof it (and the mingled fragrance of beer, tobacco, and roast porkgenerally leaves a vivid impression) might induce him to turn up hisnose a little less frequently in the future at everything that is putbefore him. Then there is that generous party, the cadger's delight,who is so free with his small change, but who never thinks of payinghis debts. It might

e man will insist onshaking hands with him then an

ies. It isn't funny to be thoughtmean and stingy. It isn't funny to be shabby and to be ashamed ofyour address. No, there is nothing at all funny in poverty--to the

iscomforts themselves

cared Robinson Crusoe for a patch on his trousers? Did he weartr

his umbrella was a cotton one, so long as it kept the rainoff? His shabbine

hed as such. A poor man is despised the whole world over;despised as much by a Christian as by a lord, as much by a demagogueas by a footman, and not all the copy-book maxims ever set for inkstained youth will make him respected. Appearances are everything, sofar as human opinion goes, and the man who will walk down Piccadillyarm in arm with the most notorious scamp in London, provided he is awell-dressed one, will slink up a back street to say a couple of wordsto a seedy-looking

d attends to him at once, to thegreat indignation of the lady in the next box, who, however,sarcastically observes that she don't mind being kept waiting "if itis a regular customer." Why, from the pleasant and businesslikemanner in which the transaction is carried out, it might be a largepurchase in the three per cents. Yet what a piece of work a man makesof his first "pop." A boy popping his first question is confidenceitself compared with him. He hangs about outside the shop until hehas succeeded in attracting the attention of all the loafers in theneighborhood and has aroused strong suspicions in the mind of thepoliceman on the beat. At last, after a careful examination of thecontents of the windows,

nd contradictshimself, and it is only a miracle if he does not confess to havingstolen it that very day. He is thereupon informed that they don'twant anything to do with his sort, and t

ng-door ajar and peerin you draw upon yourself the contemptuous looks of the barmaid, whoat once puts you down in the same category with area sneaks andcadgers. You also create a certain amount of agitation among themarried portion of the customers. You don't see the clock because itis behind the door; and

watch "to be repaired" half an hour,some one is sure to stop you in the street and conspicuousl

ittle boy who dreamed he went to heaven, atmeeting so many people there that they never expected to see. For mypart, I think it a much more independent course than borrowing fromfriends, and I always try to impress this upon those of myacquaintance who incline toward "wanting a couple

s--most of us more. Some are hard up for a thousand pounds; somefo

amongmy readers would kindly lend it me, I should be very much obligedindeed. They could send it to me under cover to Messrs. Fie