The Last Dress

"I'm not going to sugarcoat things for you, Miss Mendez. You only have at least eight months to live based on your test results" My heart skipped a beat. My mom, who was trying hard not to cry, held my hand.

The doctor looked at me straightly but I can see her worries too.

I smiled at them both, telling them that it's okay.

"It's okay mum. Im fine, you don't need to be worried"

I am prepared.

I already knew this would happen to me. I know I won't live any longer in this chaotic but beautiful world.

I have cancer, some sort of malignant neoplasm of blood-forming tissues. It was discovered just last year because I noticed that I was getting a lot of bruises and I was paler as well. So I decided to have a check up, but it was a little too late.

"I am sorry to inform you that you're not getting any better. You have stage 4 acute lymphoblastic leukemia so you have to expect the worst"

The first time I heard that news, I was baffled. I felt so lost, I did not know what to do. I was feeling empty and low. Days and days passed by, all the people that I know came to support me but I shut them down. I don't want them to see me in this situation, wrecked and a mess. I don't want them to pity me, that's why I kept my distance. I ignored them.

"Vey, sweetheart let's go" I stared at my mom for a second then smiled at her again. She's really beautiful, she looks so young for her age too.

I stood up then bowed at the doctor. I also thanked her for taking care of me and guiding me in handling my condition cautiously.

The doctor then led our way out of her clinic.

As I've told you earlier, since I ignored all of them. When I left the house, I wandered off the mountains and let out all of my feelings, I screamed and I questioned the Creator. I asked Him what was the reason why he gave me this, and of all people why do I have to suffer like this. I stayed in the mountain tops for three days, I was cold, hungry and tired but I still did not get an answer.

Then all of a sudden my body felt so numb, I felt so woozy as if the world was turning around and all went black. I did not know what happened during the time I fainted.

"Are you sure you want to go there, dear?"

I nodded and smiled with assurance.

To continue my story about me wandering around the mountains, I woke up in a place. A quiet, peaceful and calming place after I fainted. It was peculiar as to how and why I got in here, a man then came inside. He told me everything that happened after I fainted. He was a pastor. I stayed in the guest room of the church for a week, and I shared my problems.

His only answer was "God has a plan ahead for you". At first, I didn't get him but in just a week of joining such church activities, sharing your feelings and views to the others, praying and putting more faith in Him and His words. I realized that his answer was right, my mind was clear and calm.

"Sweetheart we're here" I looked at her with excitement.

Staying in the church for a week made me realize that I don't need to be afraid because God has much better plans for me in heaven. I should not be afraid, rather I should be grateful because He gave me a situation that He knows I could handle it well and also excited because I could finally see Him up there.

"Hey, what are you thinking? Are you nervous?" She holds my hand tightly

"Nothing, and I am just a bit nervous" I answered

Today was my first day in college. It was never my parents' plan to let me continue my studies because they plan to make me go into chemotherapy but I insisted on going to college. I really wanted to pursue my dream, so in the end they agreed

And here I am now, entering the campus.

"Thanks mum" She replied with a smile and then we went straight to the dean's office for guidance

"Welcome Mrs. Mendez and Veronika, welcome to our campus" The dean greeted us warmly and let us sat down the chairs

So mum and the dean started talking about some things that I did not understand, then all of a sudden mum's phone rang.

"I'm sorry Dean, an emergency came. Please take care of my Veronika" The dean nodded and smiled with assurance to my mom

"Vey, will you be alright on your own?" She wore her worried face when she said that and for some weird reason, I find it cute.

"Yeah mum, It's alright don't worry" So all three of us stood up to go outside the office.

Mum hugged me and waved goodbye then she rushed outside the campus. When me and the dean were the only one left, she escorted me to my room.

Some of the students were currently looking at me. They're probably wondering why I entered class in the middle half of the semester. I've got to admit, walking here and seeing lively people makes me feel happy.

"And here we are, let's go inside your room and meet your blockmates Veronika" I just smiled at her. She lead the way in and I followed her

Everyone was looking at me, some smiled and some were not really happy to see me so I am kinda nervous right now.