Sincerely Amanda

It was my wedding day. I was sitting on a velvet upholstered stool after getting my makeup done by a celebrity makeup artist who flew in this morning specifically for me and my impending bliss. I was wearing a custom Vera Wang bridal gown with a gossimer veil draped around my shoulders. My veil had also been customized with inlaid Swarovski crystals that trailed around elven sentences from my favorite book, The Lord of The Rings.

From my window inside the Shangri-La Hotel, I could simply look out and see the lit-up Eiffel tower in the distance. It was a beautiful, cool evening in summer and nothing could possibly be more perfect.

Except, nothing was perfect. Everything was all very, very wrong.

My exquisite makeup was in black smears beneath my eyes and on the pristine white of my satin, elbow-length gloves. I was sobbing like a little bitch in front of the man of my dreams as he sat on the stool in front of mine with his hands in his lap, looking completely poised, calm...and perfect.

"I know. You have every right to be angry with me. It's just...I really don't think it's the right time to be getting married. I feel like there is so much left for me to discover and learn about the world and--"

"Wait, wait! Did this epiphany occur to you before, or after you cheated?" I interjected with a bitter scowl, making me appear even more...radiant.

"Come on, Angelina, don't be like that."

My fiance, Viru drew back with a sigh. Was he serious right now? Ten more minutes and we were supposed to be walking down an incredibly lavish wedding aisle covered on either sides with his family and friends, and my one relative; my mom.

How did I find myself here? I began to ask myself. I didn't consider myself to be the dimwit who couldn't tell if her boyfriend loved her or not, but I guess cheaters came in all shapes and sizes, wrapped in pretty bowties and spouting articulate promises of love.

Five years...I had been with this perfect, amazing man for five years. We had created an entire life itinerary around our goals, our future kids, our fucking dream chateau in France!

I had met Viru through a blind date set up by my friends. He was an investor, a talented one at that. He could talk circles around anyone on wall street about what was hot and what was a dead end. He could snap his fingers and have several start-up businesses flourishing. He was intelligent, cunning, incredibly handsome in that blue blood sort of way with the clean cut blonde hair and striking blue eyes.

I, on the other hand, was an author. Albeit a successful one, but also an incredibly outspoken, artsy-fartsy, nonfiltered one. Thinking about it now, it's hard to even guess why he would take one look at me. Just nearing height at five'three, I wasn't exactly a super model. More like a step up from one of the munchkins in that old Wizard of Oz movie complete with the never-ending mouth. My hair was dull brown, straight and mortal enemies with all curling irons. My eyes were probably my most attractive feature about me. They were violet. It was an unusual color, but it was my color and I loved it.

Except now, they were red, puffy and surrounded by big, grotesque black circles of mascara.

"You're serious...you're completely serious." I muttered, staring at him in dumbfounded shock.

He sighed again, making me want to reach out and slap his perfect, handsome face. He looked back at me in...pity?!

"I'm sorry, Angelina, I really am. It's just...your mother and I..."

Excuse me, what?

"What about my mom?" I whispered as I could feel the blood quickly draining from my face. He stood to his feet and walked to the window, gaining safe distance from me. Smart man.

"Angelina...I hate to tell you this way. I waited way too long. God, I'm so sorry." He said on another fucking sigh. I was beginning to lose my sanity at this point and I snapped at him while standing to my feet.

"Just say it! I've got nothing left to lose, right?!