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Chapter one

From the way he was dressed, I could surmise that Albert was here for the wedding—he looked charming as usual. His Armani gray suit gave more compliments to his color but why did my heart feel like jumping out of its cage?. My heart squeezed in my chest. I feared I wouldn't be able to breathe ever again.

"Why the hell are you late for your wedding?" His father thundered while his mother did a once over at him and busted into a disgusting fit of laughter.

"He was taking his time obviously" she whined in mockery.

"Albert… what happened?" My voice came out tiny and cranky. My eyes were puffy and red from unshed tears and I wasn't sure what I would be like after all this humiliation was done. I placed my hand on his arm but he flinched away, causing my hands to fall limply by my side.

His mother snickered and the clamoring in the church heightened—Thea stood transfixed on her spot.

"If you are ready, let us commence the wedding already," Father Christopher said through the public address system. I heard him clearly and so did every other person in the church but none of us moved. Was he clueless? "Our soon-to-be couples, if you are…" Albert interrupted the old priest from finishing his statement.

"Yes, let's get started," Albert said, walking towards the altar. What should I do? Should I go after him? For fucks sake why would anybody show up at his wedding —claiming to be ready to get married in a pajama slide?

"Okay, let's go get you married, '' Mrs. West spurred, clapping her hands dramatically. Mr. shifted from his wife to his son in distress. He was silently begging for the both of them to call off this madness. What did I ever do to make Mrs. Macaroni West hate me this much? From pouring drinks on my body to…. I broke out of my reverie from the sound of someone hearing their throat. Thea subtly pinched me to get my attention. I looked up and saw both Albert and Father Christopher waiting for me at the altar. The flag was waving in all shades of red but I ignored it and went still and like I hadn't thought in my wildest dreams ever, I was getting married subconsciously.

"The vows," The priest said, causing me to be aware of my situation once again. Another chance to salvage the last of my dignity but… the atmosphere was thick and the tension palpable. I was anxious as I sweated in all the unimaginable places. I cleared my throat as I got ready to say my vow.

"I, Alexis Marier Luiz, chooses you Albert West to me my husband before in this congregation—to love and to cherish, to have and to hold for better or worse, from richer to poorer, in sickness and in health, through all the time of our lives until death do us part" I finalized my vow.

Thea heaved a sigh of anguish and mumbled "what the hell Lexie?" Her breath fanned the neck at the back of my neck, a slight reminder of what I was supposed to do but I ignored it. The audience was going wild in murmurs and Mrs. West was having the time of her life, as she watched me repeatedly make a fool of myself. The atmosphere wasn't right and Albert didn't look all-ready but he was here with me on the altar, willing and ready to get married to me; to hell with whatever anybody has to say.

Albert cleared his throat as he got ready to say his vows. He brought out a piece of neatly folded paper from his pocket before flashing me a smile. Surprisingly, he turned to face the congregation.

"My greetings to all of you and my apologies for keeping you all waiting" Albert started but broke off to remove a neatly folded paper from his pocket. Was that proper? I mean was it okay to acknowledge your guest in that manner while taking your vows?

Turning to look at me he continued…

"Alexis Marie Luiz, you are the most amazing woman I know and the prettiest too. You taught me things that I'm grateful for. I won't lie, you sharpened my senses and because of you, I'd come to understand what it means to love. ``His voice was baritone and so husky, kissing away every form of anger and embarrassment I felt before now. God, I never knew he could be this sweet. I slightly turned to look at Thea and she had this "this wasn't what I was expecting kind of look" well, not just you girl, me, and every other person here in this church. Mr. West had a relaxed smile, the priest looked like he was officiating a real wedding, and Mrs. West, well, she was indifferent.

"I'm grateful for what you are to me and for teaching me what it means to love—it is because of this I realized the trueness of what I feel for you" he looked up from the paper and held my gaze. "I'm sorry it took this long to realize this, but I can't continue with this facade. Whatever I feel for you is not love. I won't lie we had a sort of connection but it was mostly forced. I was only trying to reciprocate your vibes"

Holy Cow! What the hell was going on? I would hear whispers and uproar but none of them was comprehensible.

"I didn't want to be dramatic and wanted to end this earlier before your proposal but you were so clingy and hung up on me… I didn't even know how we got here. But now I do and I know I don't want to be your husband"

What sort of a joke was this?

"Albert please don't do this to me" my voice was tiny yet carried a massive volume of plea.

"I can't and won't marry you, Alexis Marie Luiz. Here's your ring"

********

I'd always shunned suicide. My life hadn't been the best but it was pleasant enough to want to see it through until a few months ago. Most often than not, I'd judged suiciders for being irresponsible but now, here I was, up here on this high roof ready to end my disgusting life. Disgusting because my life right now was unbearable, uncomfortable, and saddening—rumors are supposed to end but after three months, it seemed there was no end to mine. If anything, it was more lies coming forth after the other. I was too tired to put up with the torture of the world. Joining my parents would be better.

I decided to opt for a little quiet moment before my death since ending my life suddenly felt scary but unfortunately for me, the door to the terrace was just shoved open so hard. The door slammed shut again and footsteps moved swiftly across the deck. I don’t even bother looking up. Whoever it was more than likely won’t even notice me back here straddling the ledge to the left of the door.

I sighed quietly, closing my eyes and leaning my head against the stucco wall behind me, cursing the universe for being so unfair.