HYMN OF PAST BXB

Theodore is sitting near the window, letting his tears to fall down his cheeks. he feels so lonely, so useless, not important, and feel so disgusted about himself right now.

blaming himself that he didn't save the most important person In his life. this is his every day routine. spending his free time to cry,to regret everything has happened.

every day he is craving for her mother's embrace, craving for her presence.but he used to be a type of boy that always cheerful before, a boy that always admire how beautiful the world.

but all of that disappeared when his mother died from a heart disease 3 yrs ago. 2nd day after her mother died, he attempt to commit a suicide by cutting his neck but gladly, Brian saw him in the kitchen and immediately pulled the knife from Theodore's hand. Brian morrer is his bestfriend since high schoo. same age,same habit, but not same height.

"Son, hows your school?"

"this day is so beautiful....but you're more beautiful mom"

"ohhh youre such a sweet kid son, but did you have fun?"

"yes super and hahahaha, Brian is still small"

"oh so you're saying that your height is high?"

"eomma hahahaha, you know the answer of that"

"stop hugging me now and change your clothes son, you smell sweat"

"mmmm okay, I love mom"

"I love you too son"

some of memories that Theodore can't forget. it's just so hurt for him, to accept that his mother is no longer alive in this world.

"m-mom i-i miss you s-so damn m-much now, why c-cant I j-just follow y-you?"- you can feel the sadness on his voice.

still sobbing, crying in this whole 20mnts until Brian opened his room door and sit Infront of him.

"don't tell me, you were crying again?"- Brian said with worried

face.

"i-i miss m-my m-mom brai (short term for Brian)"- still sobbing loudly.

"it's been 3 yrs now bro,you should accept it already"- he said, as he tapped his bestfriends shoulder.

"b-but how? i-if i-its my fault, why s-she died"- Theodore's reply.

"Bro, stop blaming yourself, stop wasting your time to cry everyday. it's not even your fault"- advicing his bestfriend everyday is one of his duty, if he still wants him by his side

"b-but i-its hurt, I want to h-hug her now brai"- Theodore said while still crying.

"I know it's hurt, but it doesn't mean you will just waste your entire life for crying. you still have a future bro

and it doesn't matter if your mom is still here or not"- trying to calm Theodore.

"ok, so if we went somewhere later? you know have some fun?"- Brian said with a wide smile on his face.

"n-nahh I have w-work later, y-you know that, were working on a same p-place"- Theodore said as he wiping away his tears on his cheeks.