Rahbeem Roth thinks he's taking a job at America's first official magic school...but really, he's the newest participant in America's biggest science experiment! The teenagers are the lab rats, and the staff is made up of all kinds of demons. In these High School halls, science and the supernatural will go to war in this bizarre paranormal comedy!
INT. THE GREGORY SHOW - ON T.V.
The set of the TV talk show "GREGORY" lights up with an upbeat musical number.
We see a smiling GREGORY, 50s, salt and pepper hair, sitting on stage holding a manila envelope in his hands.
GREGORY
Okay! Our next guest is Jasmine. She's been sleeping with a married man and is here to prove that he's the father of her 18-month-old daughter, Pixieyeayah!
Sitting in a chair beside Gregory, JASMINE, white, 24 gets animated and starts "telling it like it is" to the audience.
JASMINE
Yeah, that's right! Rahbeem's a deadbeat! He needs to take care of our baby!
The large monitor TV screen behind Gregory displays a plump baby girl.
JASMINE
Yeah! That's her! That's my baby, look at 'er! Ain't she beautiful?
Gregory still smiling brightly as he turns back around.
GREGORY
Oooh, she's fat!
Jasmine frowns.
GREGORY
Let's bring out the man who might be the father of Fat Pat!
JASMINE
Her name is PIXIEYEAYAH–
GREGORY
FAT PAT! Rahbeem Roth, come on out here and let's see if you are the father!
RAHBEEM ROTH, an overweight 25-year-old Black man, struts out. The audience starts booing and jeering.
Jasmine is on her feet, heckling him as soon as he appears.
JASMINE
BOOO!! That's right, BOOO! Take care a yo' baby!
RAHBEEM
Booooo to you too! That ain't my baby! Look at that baby!
He angrily points at the monitor.
RAHBEEM
She don't look nothing like me!
JASMINE
What you mean that ain't your baby? Look how big her ass is! Who I had that BIG ASS baby with, if not YOU?
RAHBEEM
See what ya'll don't know is Jasmine comes from a whole family of PAGAN WITCHES.
SFX: The audience "ohhh's."
GREGORY
(Looks mystified)
Pagan witches?
RAHBEEM
Yeah! They into all kinds of dark magic, voodoo stuff! They all Spiritual-ist!
JASMINE
Why spirits gonna make my baby fat like that? That's your GENES that made her fat! Spirits of yo' fat ass DNA cells!
Jasmine and Rahbeem start arguing angrily in each other's faces.
The audience continues laughing and yelling, fully entertained by this.
JASMINE
If I know witchcraft, why yo' ass ain't a chicken right now? Huh? Why you ain't a six-piece?
RAHBEEM
All you do is think about food. That's why that baby's so big! Look at 'er. LOOK! She tryna eat the little giraffes on her baby clothes!
The baby is on the screen, chewing on the little giraffe print on her baby shirt.
Gregory finally stops laughing and holds up the envelope.
GREGORY
I have the results of the paternity test right here!
The audience starts clapping and cheering with anticipation.
Gregory opens the envelope with the results of the paternity test. Jasmine and Rahbeem keep yelling at each other.
RAHBEEM
Paternity test? You need to test that baby's cholesterol. Jasmine be tryna fry her baby food!
JASMINE
You havin' another one of your delirious dreams! A psychotic fit!
Gregory pulls the sheet of paper out of the envelope; he begins to read it.
GREGORY
Rahbeem...
SFX: Drum Roll.
GREGORY
You are the father!
Rahbeem jumps up and spins around angrily.
RAHBEEM
DAMN IT!
Jasmine jumps up and starts cheering and getting in his face.
JASMINE
Woooo!!! I told you!! I TOLD YOU!!
RAHBEEM
Well, I-if I'm the father then-
RAHBEEM
(A beat)
YOU GONNA STOP FEEDING THAT BABY FRIED PLANTAINS THEN!
Jasmine and Rahbeem are both standing up, getting in each other's faces again.
Jasmine pushes him and dares him to hit her back. She takes a thugged-out fighting stance, like she's going to fight him like a man.
Rahbeem stays put and continues to reprimand Jasmine for feeding his 18-month-old daughter bacon burgers and Jalapeno cheese fries.
The audiences applaud and jeers.
And Gregory sits there looking very satisfied at having completely debased the human race just a little bit more today.
And as Gregory continues a somewhat sinister-sounding laugh, the scene switches off just like a TV set. And there's a stalling darkness.
Chapter 1 Welcome to the Gregory Show!'
04/10/2025
Chapter 2 Student Orientation
08/10/2025
Chapter 3 Power Play
08/10/2025
Chapter 4 Christmas Snow
08/10/2025
Chapter 5 Faster, Vegas! Faster!
08/10/2025
Chapter 6 Welcome to Absolution, Professor Roth!
08/10/2025
Chapter 7 Para-Normal
08/10/2025
Chapter 8 The Demon Hunters
08/10/2025
Chapter 9 The First Spellbook
08/10/2025
Chapter 10 Ecto
08/10/2025
Chapter 11 Crash and Go
08/10/2025
Chapter 12 Bounce in the Bathroom
08/10/2025
Chapter 13 Welcome to the Playground!
08/10/2025