FIRE AND SILK

I can't believe I came back” I whispered to myself. The evening breeze of Beijing hit my face as stood by the cafe window peeking at Clay Wuyan who was seated in the corner.

When I arrived in Beijing this afternoon, I never expected to see him here. This was our special cafe, and the memories had pushed me to come over and have a meal. To my surprise, the object of my affection and desires was here already. Engrossed in his cell phone he with an adorable look that I had never seen.

What the fuck should I do?” I whispered as I ran my hands through my hair. For the past three years, I had lived my life as a cold-blooded ruthless Mafia but here I was hesitating.

I huffed, threw caution to the wind, and walked into the cafe. He immediately lifted his head and his eyes widened when they landed on me. He stood up and his eyes sparkled with a glint of happiness. I felt my heartbeat race as my body vibrated. Clay Wuyan opened his mouth, but no words came out.

My mind raced as the words in my brain echoed.

Every day, Yearning asks me,

That sense of warmth Which I forgot Years ago,

O wandering soul Make me yours Just for once,

ust for once Make me your own.

These words, embedded deep in my heart rang out so loud that I gasped for breath. I thought this was going to be easy but being here, my heart ached all over again. I turned around and walked out of the cafe. I knew that there was no place in the world that I could run to since my heart belonged to Clay Wuyan.

Four years ago, I escaped knowing well that I was being a coward. Clay Wuyan had the power to make his soul feel alive and every cell of his body burn. My feet slowed down when I reached a silent ally. Out of breath, I stopped and leaned back on the wall gazing at the wide sky above.

"If the Mafia knew that I could run away from someone” I muttered in a huff. I knew that by running away again, it was inevitable to create a deeper misunderstanding between us.

My body calmed down as I gazed at the Beijing night sky. I had missed this view and had immediately rushed back to Beijing to protect Clay Wuyan. Hiding behind this reason, I knew that my heart had other plans. Clay Wuyan was my everything. I closed my eyes and visions of him came rushing back.

Him. His visions, his memories, his smile.

Lost in thought the numbness in my right leg made me snapped me out of it. Sighing to myself, I turned to leave and found Clay Wuyan standing in distance watching me. All the calmness and strength I had gathered vanished. I was surprised that he had followed me. Time seemed to stand still as I watched the angry expression on Clay Wuyan"s face. Ignoring his defiant stance, I walked over and stood in front of him.

I was about to speak when he asked, “You are back?” The slight crook in his voice sounded like he had struggled to speak.