Divorce, Rebirth, and Sweet Success

d them again, I was back in my bed, twenty-five years younger, before my life became a hollow

break. I had seen a picture of August, his college sweetheart Heidi, and our son Kadin o

private airfield, desperate to stop them. I saw them there, bathed in morn

t are you doing here? You're making a scene." I ignored him, confron

ining our trip with Aunt Heidi!" He sneered, "Because yo

ou've done. You've upset He

pent years sacrificing my dreams to be the perfect wife

Are you trying to get my attention, Carolynn? This is a pathetic new low." I walked to the desk, pul

pte

as the sharp, blinding pain b

lk canopy of my bed. The morning sun streamed through the

en. I looked at my hands. They were smooth, witho

ollow marriage to August Savage, an ambitious U.S. Senator who saw me as nothing more than

For twenty-five years, they carried on an emotional affair right under my nos

al career. The truth was simpler. He needed a wife who would be a glorified servant, someone to manage his life so he

ust, Heidi, and our son Kadin on a family retreat. They looked

iet heartbreak, it all culm

snap at the housekeeper, "Why is she making

ck. Back at t

onor retreat at the senator's private mountain lodge. The d

and ran out of the house, not even bothering with s

ecurity. I pushed through the crowd, my heart poun

er, was adjusting our eight-year-old son Kadin's collar. Heidi Case stood beside them, her hand resting o

as the scene that had haunted m

yelled, my

s smile vanished when he saw me.

and angry. "Carolynn, what are you

at Heidi. "Who are you? And why

oncern. "Carolynn, you must be confused. I'm Heidi Case,

?" I let out a

tight. "Enough, Carolynn. Stop t

Go away!" Kadin yelled, pushing me hard.

ill that had nothing to do with the morning air. I looked

asked, my voice trembling

in sneered. "Aunt Heidi is s

i' s eyes welled up, and she looked at August with a wounded exp

st and Kadin immediately softened

ust hissed. "You've upset He

ing," Kadin said, his voice dripping with dis

the household, sacrificing my own dreams and identity to be the perfect political wife and mother. I cook

ervant. Redundant. An obstacle to

ynn, don't be upset. Of course you can come with us. We

things worse. It made me lo

idi is being gracious. Now, are you coming, or

ng. I sat alone, an invisible ghost in my own life. I remembered a conversation from my past life, Aug

head, a constant remi

re. Their faces fell when they saw me. They adored Heid

ed Heidi' s wit, her political insights, her

l gathered on the scenic o

ving me over. He pushed me away when I tried to stand n

was happening again.

ckdrop. August with his arm around Heidi, Kadin leaning against h

he viewfinder, the image that had literally killed me. I saw the li

ck. I pressed the shutter button. Click. The

e. He and Kadin walked ahead with Heidi, their laughter ech

our D.C. townhouse,

" August commanded, drop

a snack," Kadin demanded

grief of two lifetimes, of twenty-five ye

er, surrounded by the life I had built

ce was quiet, barely a whisper, but it la

get a d

stared at me, their faces a m

hreatening step towards me, his eye

m and steady. "I said, let

"Are you trying to get my attention, Carolyn

om. Dad's about to run for president. You think he'll l

I walked over to the desk where August kept his legal documents, pulled out the divorce papers

nymore. This time, I