Chasing The Star He Lost

ooked fl

me that," he mumble

ard expl

ay the significance

mfort was

my expression c

monologue

mly call their mother'

ical obs

hrough his fl

ing more a

me then, his

his tone disapproving. "I

ng aestheti

o control m

o Chloe, who was, of cour

olism of

ind

not the color h

in the background, like

nal ques

with a new, bitter realizat

n' t

e a small,

resig

al exha

ing from these smal

was no

was filled with

nce between us wa

mmuni

engine and the city

l state was

ried myself in studying

pendent

-rel

l growth outside th

ties were

barely

late at the lab" or "m

of those colleagu

erence to

lf-abs

in my personal life

x Corp deal f

erling Advisory,

ted on a cele

ssional

gnit

st to my perso

elf go th

ch cha

uch r

ability i

udly, leaning on my c

d guy, alway

reliant o

e for an unexpec

erned, too

d. I' m calling Jul

d protest, he

d male lead

e and t

the other end, reve

Julian' s voice

trollin

e judgment o

m the addres

drunken affectio

slurred, rea

for comfort, for connec

ing to the surface in

't say

oped me int

essive

ying posse

ontrol me, even

his do

lance at the white blou

imperceptible

val of co

fter colors, closer t

y linked

ue, if I could hear

up at our

lly so controlle

e physica

rges, perhaps by the sight

smell of his cologne, the

aw em

of it all, he sa

hl

trayal, a repe

g his true

pain, even du

if, his unconsc

stumbled to

cy contrace

acy self-p

and phys

to prevent unwa

ffering was a

etending to be asle

lo

ipulati

immediate

er continue

my new apartment. I' m scared."

of bed in

be righ

ate depart

lty to the riva

, showing hi

ck "lab crisis" mutt

there,

fer

n and hu

riorities, stark

ue, my internal e

s later, my

te

m C

I th

e didn' t still love me, would he?

ect t

d text, deliber

ance, revealing

rom Julian, replying to her t

l have feelings

ion of endur

mate con

statin

fears r