Guy Mannering, Or, the Astrologer

ed out my impress, leaving me no sign,Save men’s opinions and my living blood,To show the world I am a gentleman.Richard II.When the bo

ought within himself that the worshipful bench suffered no great deprivation from wanting the assistance of his good-humoured landlord. Mr. Bertram had now hit upon one of the few subjects on which he felt sore, and went on with some energy.‘No, sir, the name of Godfrey Bertram of Ellangowan is not in the last commission, though there’s scarce a carle in the country that has a plough-gate of land, but what he must ride to quarter — sessions and write J.P. after his name. I ken fu’ weel whom I am obliged to — Sir Thomas Kittlecourt as good as tell’d me he would sit in my skirts if he had not my interest at the last election; and because I chose to go with my own blood and third cousin, the Laird of Balruddery, they keepit me off the roll of freeholders; and now there comes a new nomination of justices, and I am left out! And whereas they pretend it was because I let David Mac — Guffog, the constable, draw the warrants, and manage the business his ain gate, as if I had been a nose o’ wax, it’s a main untruth; for I granted but seven warrants in my life, and the Dominie wrote every one of them — and if it had not been that unlucky business of Sandy Mac-Gruthar’s, that the constables should have keepit twa or three days up yonder at the auld castle, just till they could get conveniency to send him to the county jail — and that cost me eneugh o’ siller. But I ken what Sir Thomas wants very weel — it was just sic and siclike about the seat in the kirk o’ Kilmagirdle — was I not entitled to have the front gallery facing the minister, rather than Mac-Crosskie of Creochstone, the son of Deacon Mac-Crosskie, the Dumfries weaver?’Mannering expressed his acquiescence in the justice of these various complaints.‘And then, Mr. Mannering, there was the story about the road and the fauld-dike. I ken Sir Thomas was behind there, and I said plainly to the clerk to the trustees that I saw the cloven foot, let them take that as they like. Would any gentleman, or set of gentlemen, go and drive a road right through the corner of a fauld-dike and take away, as my agent observed to them, like twa roods of gude moorland pasture? And there was the story about choosing the collector of the cess — ’‘Certainly, sir, it is hard you should meet with any neglect in a country where, to judge from the extent of their residence, your ancestors must have made a very important figure.’‘Very true, Mr. Mannering; I am a plain man and do not dwell on these things, and I must needs say I have little memory for them; but I wish ye could have heard my father’s stories about the auld fights of the Mac-Dingawaies — that’s the Bertrams that now is — wi’ the Irish and wi’ the Highlanders that came here in their berlings from Ilay and Cantire; and how they went to the Holy Land — that is, to Jerusalem and Jericho, wi’ a’ their clan at their heels — they had better have gaen to Jamaica, like Sir Thomas Kittlecourt’s uncle — and how they brought hame relics like those that Catholics have, and a flag that’s up yonder in the garret. If they had been casks of muscavado and puncheons of rum it would have been better for the estate at this day; but there’s little comparison between the auld keep at Kittlecourt and the castle o’ Ellangowan; I doubt if the keep’s forty feet of front. But ye make no breakfast, Mr. Mannering; ye’re no eating your meat; allow me to recommend some of the kipper. It was John Hay that catcht it, Saturday was three weeks, down at the stream below Hempseed ford,’ etc. etc. etc.The Laird, whose indignation had for some time kept him pretty steady to one topic,