From Burger Barn to Billionaire's Trap

courses, hidden behind the guise of "exploring new interests." The Waltons p

money to get smarter.

y, where he'd sit miserably scrolling through his phone while I "browsed fashion magazines."

hauffeur to academic excellen

these magazines,

from a particularly dense calculus problem se

rush the SATs and his

Waltons. I'd perfected the art of the

ay, sweetie?" M

le online. Blake took me to l

" = quadratic equa

was supposedly swamped with her own SAT prep and extracurricula

ed on her progress, often w

n "Overcoming Adversity." The irony is thi

overcoming adversity by pretendin

erge, usually to throw a pa

neered one evening, finding me by the pool again.

's feeling threatened by Emily'

ook. "Yale? Is that,

led and pulled me closer. "Don't wor

s practically a walking

off. The subtitl

dle the fake-dumb act. It's too

lack of ambition, my reliance on Blake, my frivolous spending (all on

ut me officially withdrawing fr

rles said one dinner. "To make it o

g. They think she's ho

weetly. "O

itles we

im DADDY! She's committe

she's completely lost it. My

countdown was to SAT scores