He Built Two Families, I Was Only Half of One

everyone, thought h

married to E

a big Manhat

he Hayes Corporation,

a happy couple, a rich c

eliev

Ethan loved

m a simple

s darling, and he

em was they ha

baby more t

, Mrs. Miller,

alked about

, grandchildren

med to understan

to the more difficult

orried about

was being kin

ternoon, eve

er for the Centra

people were laughi

d for Ethan, he was

across the

five or six years

messy hair and b

Ethan, his sma

is voice clear eve

I have som

dd

ord h

champagne flute sudd

hest, a strange, cold feel

uldn'

dn't hav

n't have

mistake, some m

ide, a familiar sadness

nted one f

at passed was

held her wh

each other, Mia. Th

near him, to feel his presence, t

gressive fertility options, the one

always h

rough that pain, Mia. Your

ways touched her,

hat boy, his words echoe

towards them, her le

seemed to

atter around her fa

see was Etha

d, a soft, fond smile Mia had rare

ed the b

ed, a happy,

re of pure, si

er and

n from this distanc

h caught in

e was faint, b

n's features in

began to solidif

closer, Eth

saw

ile va

n his eyes, jus

replaced by his usu

his hand still on

e too loud, a little too cheerful

d at Mia with

uldn't

d at the child

s. They were

hit her again, h

s not a

down and whispered

woman standing near an ice cream ca

up, his sm

he son of an old college roommate. Mark. You rem

y remember

ng a tough time. I'm just helping out where I can. She actuall

rm around Mi

kay? You shouldn't wander off li

ere smooth,

felt a

her, subtly,

," Mia said, her voi

led, a dism

ing him to the office, or if I'm helping her out. He's proba

on was detail

s, Jessica's struggle, how he

much about it because he

gestured vaguely, implying their childlessness. "I didn'

his eyes full of app

ase had been plan

, cold seed, b

as too neat

... they were too

eek, Mrs. Mi

ion? Or perhaps trying that new clinic Dr. Peterson mention

t, but the pressur

e familiar

had gently steered her away from ne

These things can't be rushed. And I don't w

his words f

felt like

from having a child with hi

t was ugly

, Mia coul

boy, Leo, kept fl

right eyes, the way

ad

d to Etha

trembling slightly. "That boy,

oft, reassuring so

led he

ou want a baby so badly, you're star

ed her

ven start looking into adoption seriously,

meant to soot

nt, Mia wanted

e image from the park,

seed of une

hollow, his affect

med that something

wouldn't

th each pa

orking late

ed, hushed conversations ending a

her voice edged with impat

mounted fro

was out for a "la

n their huge, s

amplified he

to share years ago, for photos and documents

accessed

need to know, she foun

er forgott

w it. A fold

mmered again

icked

en Ethan and

essional

te. Fa

ars. Six, almo

y became his assistant after

, ph

Ethan beside her, his arm ar

led, Ethan holding him with a

on a birthday cake, Ethan looking on

entries synced fr

Little

octor

rst day o

retched back

s of a se

ret f

re, in cold, hard

the face, bruta

he screen, her

stencies she had brushed aside ove

iness trips that d

anations for e

hildren with a strange, wistful expres

t was about *thei

it was abou

ception pressed down

d him, trusted

heir entire ma

nausea, a profound

a symbol of their success, no

lent, racking sobs tha

fe she thought she had was a c

shattered into a