The Actor's Contract

= 18

s, I officially have a girlfrien

rancisco (Enr

irst time when she's

nrique

cking backstabbing gold digger using you to extort ev

But I'm not worried ... given that he has a ton of pennies, whoever will need to engage in a

tedly, as if I'm paying

e Damion ... use

cing soon," I tease, "But th

e coffee table while simultaneously getting up from the brow

Soothing. Endless. As if th

take in th

the girl in my shower ― wh

w tight, hands in my pocket as if it may st

did I get mys

nto the tightly-controlled isolation I've built like a c

nvaded. By a redhead with stormy eyes and biting wit. And a

idea ― I'm helping a little girl to get better while I'm fis

what

that I'm not worthy of anything. That underneath the image I've been building up is a coward who

that? The

eath. I'm the one who rejected L

with her. The one to call her what should never have been said. The one

st - uninvited. Wi

edged into my mind wit

to the way Jackson sat on the floor removing his blo

e was to

s quiet. Not everyone's

ong quiet.

r the proverb

e kitchen - thin, tacky smears of it, l

oked lost and out of place i

ng sour, mixed with her Bolognese sauce. The kind of smell that

sto

ag. Then the sound - dripping - s

cused; my brain took in exa

was sprayed with blood, the color ranging betwe

uge, thick pool of red.

ked, pale-yellowish body - next to our dead dog. His silver coat

he could fix it. Like maybe she was still breathing if he ju

ked empty. Like plastic. A knife w

he. I fell forwa

mething inside me

came in the same package as the

s of Mom and Dad and even our Husky, Scout. They blamed me, their eyes beseeching me with accusations, as th

at's when a new layer was added, on top of th

ne truly knows the real me anymore. As things stand now, I'm not even su

n't do real anymore. So, a fake relati

n my face, and I wipe them away w

y those three words. Even as an actor, I c

re, I'm forced to act the opposite of what I've alw

An act on an act

ing on the role I always avoid. Even in my romance

. And this girl is not going to make it any eas

u

, I knew she was going to be trouble.

as if her whole endeavor sc

the most beautiful girl I've ever seen - dainty freckles, bushy r

day over the phone ... but we've only Skyped once. That time, her hair was hi

helpless fairy, sporting what is arguably the sexies

My dick wanted her. My soul wanted her. An

s, like a lost traveler trying to find his way, and then it g

and disturb the sunny sounds. For some unknown reason, it fills a void inside me I didn't

ploding with laughter. Our youthfulness was stolen a

augh ... it filled us with warmth, life, and somethin

tle girl. Anemic, head bold as a fat girl's ass, body all bone

ne hand, wearing tiny purple socks with glitter stars. She must have raided

first. Her focus is on

colors - got it from the file. On one wall, Mel painted a huge mural, depicting a realistic Disney Princess fo

ew moments to realize she stopped lau

last time I talked to a kid oth

princesses

ng so insecure? Insecurity

ing goofy faces - and turns down the sound. She looks at me more seriously, which surprises me.

ys like a little adult. She pats t

I smirk an

s forever." Whi

out a new juice box to m

als for a bit, then cocks her head. "Are you in love with her?"

, stutter. "S

ed glasses straight into my heart. "My sister. Aria. Are you in love

back of my neck. "Well

sipping her juice as if she hasn't just co

hort laugh. "

e deserves someone good." I'v

a little. "Y

ur parents died," she says matter-of-

the file. Everyt

ccusing, just curious. "B

." Trust me. I underst

ong beat. "Then you nee

brow. "E

're handsome

iously, slurping down

her feel safe. And like a person again. A young person who can enjoy life. A se

at guys she's talking about. And why I don

nks she has to be strong all the t

ands. "She probabl

sk. Just hel

p. Tough. Brave. Way too

art kid, you

missing teeth. "

softly, almost to myself. I don't wan

her head.

everything I touch. Because my mom died think

I'm not always very

uting her mouth. For a moment, it feels as if she's looking right through all my versions straight in

I try to sound composed. Cool. But I'm not fully succeeding. She offers me

her awkward, something I h

sk, Aria appears in the doorway, towel-dried hair clinging in damp, careless strands that

does absolutely nothing to tone down the damage. My chest tightens, my pulse trips over itself, because in this exact moment,

not to grab her to get a little taste of that sweet

lovingly, oblivious to m

ly tangled, twisted into kno

estion is not exactly directed at me, and for the fi

r

those boys at the airport," Leyla remind

e pleads, holding her hands together as if she's praying.

g sensually with every stride, and I take a deep, frustrated breath. I'm mantsy a

nder I'm al

and ready to pop. For a moment, it's silent. The echo of little footsteps has

ge cities every week. Used to the weight of my name filling he

ls in glitter socks giving

walk to t

sharp tongue and the way her voice cracks when she talks about Ley

her. I like her in way

ling slowly over my body before she plops down on one of the

throwing her onto the cou

ck

o purr. A thin stream of dark liquid curls into the cup, steam rising in delicate ribbons. The scent is immediate - rich, roasted, and a little bitter - sneaking up into

ghtly crooked and her arms flailing like a caffeinated windmill

mind on much more extravagant places, like how plump her nipples looked through t

was yelling because her little troll boyfriend winked at Aria. That one's got real perverted tendencies, by the way." She gasps,

"Unforg

rst, but the guy was staring at her coochie, and then the woman starte

even more with her hands. I notice the porcelain skin, the manicured hands, the g

uccino and add anot

s delivering the punchline of a joke she has waited her whole life to tell. "Sh

id n

.. models, actresses ... but none of them pull me like this girl blushing at my kitchen table.

reathe and that she was look

hat?" I take my cof

r. It's an eggplant. That's the official vegetable for rage." It's the o

emnly. "

drops her head to the co

f her toes to make herself taller, "the woman got all crazy and yell

ounds more

already had a

." No

que Bla

e. A long, slo

the countertop: "Leyla. I wil

me with a proud smi

t her. "

blic." Not exactly how I planned it ... but hey ... ou

a little more careful." The paparazzi

e. "I saved your girlfriend's reputa

lowly. "I

she sulks, nar

ot," I

ace." I roll my eyes a

But it can be a potty face ...

like she didn't just accidentally launch a PR bo

ho still hasn't lifted

oans a

ique Blackburn' were heard b

a baby. There definitely was a dog involved, and a chicken nugget, and I'm pretty sure

hair. "Great. My agent is gonna love the PR on this ...

dge door. "And FYI ... we need to go shoppin

she wants to dissolve. "What if someone posts it?

hen we lea

. "What?" She'll g

joke about it. You say something cute and funny.

cup like it's a weapon. "You can't fix everyth

so much to learn. In my world, b

smirki

ier. "It's literal

he hisses. "I'm n

She's fucking cute

d takes a bite from a carrot

ublicist? I thi

and I say

t a cut when your

s crimson

ust planning ahead. My doctor said

This ... it feels cozy. Happy. Familiar. Like a long-

ike home. L

use of a contract, a child's bold honesty, and a stupid

t. But I ca

y throat. Lik

ything I shouldn't - everything I promi

r. I can provid

.. do that fo

erves bette