Once Upon A Time

adventures, but, though I am old enough-I was twenty-five last October-and have always gone half-way to meet th

turns out to be no less than a nobleman or an actor. And women, especially beautiful women, are always pursuing Kinney in taxicabs and calling upon him for assistance. Just to look at Kinney, without knowing how clever he is at getting people out of their difficulties, he does not appear to be a man to whom you would turn in time of trouble. You would think women in distress would appeal to some one bigger and stronger; would sooner ask a policeman. But, on the contrary, it is to Kinney that women always run, especially, as I have said, beautiful women. Nothing of the sort ever happens to me. I suppose, as Kinney says, it is because he was born and brought up in New York City and looks and acts l

ve that half the things I tell you have happened

his feelings I hesitated, but he did

on the job. You won't have to take my word for it. Yo

His face was set against Fairport. The conversation of clam-diggers, he said, did not appeal to him; and he complained that at Fairport our only chance of adventure would be my capsizing the catboat or robbing a lobster-pot. He insisted we should go to the mountains, where we would meet what he always calls "our best people." In September, he explained, everybody goes to the mountains to recuperate after the enervating atmosphere of the sea-shore. To this I objected that the little sea air we had inhaled at Mrs. Shaw's basement dining-room and in the subway need cause us no anxiety. And so, along these lines, throughout the

ivate bath. While for the same accommodations the Carteret Arms asks only twenty. But the Carteret h

details to me seemed superfluous, but there was no health in pointing that out to Kinney. Because, as he himself says

y about, he snorted indignantly. "You wouldn't!" he said. "If I'd been brought up in a catboat, and had a tan like a red Indian, and hair like a Broadway blonde, I wouldn't

to your room to borrow matches? Because they admire your clothes? If

ays out at n

ys go to you to sharpen their pencils and tell them how to spell the hard words? Why do the gir

asked; "I had

ting. "He hadn't noticed!" For his vacation Kinney bought a second-hand s

carry that bag you will

ear often enough in the Social Register, and could be found only in the Old Testament, and

ight to carry a second-hand bag as a new one. The bag says i

ted out, "and then some one who

o shares in an adventure with Joe Kinney, a twenty-dollar-a-week clerk, the human adding machine, the

d ribbon round yo

ou hook 'em on to match your clothes, or the company you keep. And, what's more," he continued, with some h

at you are going to get

y, "it might help a lot if for the first week you acted as my

rivate stenographer, and the change from office work is very pleasant; but I cou

if I could tell people you were my private secretar

," I said, "you can tell people

protested Kinney. "I am only trying to sh

I assented. "It wou

where we were to go we still were undec

own the names of the summer resorts to which we can travel by rail or by boat for two dollars and put them in a hat. The name o

s the thought that the places near New York to which one coul

red, "that, with this limit of you

ch was written the name of a summer resort. Ten of these places were selected by Kinney, and ten by myself. Kinney dramatically rolled up his sleeve, and, p

sed the keenest disappointment. "It's a mill t

d seaport, one of the oldest in America. You can see whaling ves

ey, "or a pleasure trip? I don't want to see harpoons! I wouldn't

nterested over the fact that the young Earl of Ivy had at last arrived in this country. For some weeks the papers had been giving more space than seemed necessary to that young Irishman and to the young lady he was coming over to marry. There had been pictures of his different country houses, pictures of himself; in uniform, in the robes he wore at the coronation, on a polo pony, a

"'failed to establish the whereabouts of his lordship and Lady

ted at the red funne

this picture of him playing golf he wears one of those knit jackets the Eiselbaum has j

e at New Bedfor

people will be there for the wedding. It is the most important

e gangplank wearing a Harvard ribbon, Kinney hastily retired to our cabin and returned with one like it. A few minutes later I found him and the young man seated in camp-chairs side by side engaged in a conversation in which Kinney seemed to bear the greater part. Indeed, to what Kinney w

I had ever seen. She had gray eyes and hair like golden-rod, worn in a fashion with which I was not familiar, and her face was so lovel

done such a thing. But never before had I seen any one who had moved me so strangely. Seeking her, I walked the length of the main saloon and back again, but could not find her. The delay gave me time to see that my conduct was impertinent. The very fact that she was so lovely to look up

r that the young man had lef

in our conversation," Kinne

rt of the young man to talk to Kinney or

r was most polite. That," explained Kinney, "is one way you can always tell a real swell. They're not high and mighty with

had not n

was smoking one of them at the moment, and, as it grew less, had been carefully moving the gold band with which it was

see the printed page. Instead, before my eyes, confusing and blinding me, was the lovely, radiant face of the beautiful lady. In perplexity I looked up, and found her standi

. Were the latter the case, he must have been a friend, for the way in which she looked at me was kind. And there was, besides, the expression of surprise and as

question she asked sound as though she had sung it. I told her the name of the building, and that farther uptown, as she would see when we moved into midstream, there was another still taller. She listened, regarding me brightly, as though interest

," she said, "pumping

atue of Liberty, Governors Island, and the Brooklyn Bridge. The fact that it was a stranger who was talking did not seem to disturb her. I cannot tell h

be more polite. Then I saw to do so would be forcing myself upon he

rly of the battle-ships at anchor there that the lady must have th

uestion that was i

sail a catb

he frowned. Then she laughed delighte

"What do you ask, over here, when you

we were talking a

is in the navy

at, quite as though I h

ou are

Joyce & Carboy's office

se her. She regarded me doubtfully. I could see tha

She asked the question directly, as a man would have asked it, and as she spoke I was conscious that

I always worked out-of-doors; oystering and clamming and, in the f

no meaning whatsoever, but before I could explain, the y

s pleasant, but entirely vague. In the few minutes I was with him, I learned that it was no sign that he was secretl

t seem to think that outward show of respect was necessary, and kept his hands in his pocke

n your room?" he asked. The

o you rather well, don't they? And it'

be twelve," said the l

had seen one so long. He examined the end of his cigarette-holder, and, apparent

at the marble shaft risi

just informed her of that fact. The young man smiled as though h

show that had she said, "That is a rabb

tness with which he had made his first remark, "our

y. It seemed to me lacking in courtesy. He knew her, and yet treated her with no deference, while I, a stranger, felt so grateful

ly, "aren't more successful in lifting things than you

ude a speech, and as soon as I had spoken,

f half a second she

fs. Don't you see, Stumps!" she urged. In spite of my rude remark, the young man she called Stumps had continued to sm

' Oh, I say, really," he protested, "that's awfully good." He seemed to be afraid I would not ap

eal hat-band. Both were excited and disturbed. At the sight of the young man, Stumps turned appealingly to t

huffy about now? He told me I could

the young man. When he saw them coming he halted, and, when they joined him, began talking earnestly, almost a

. His tone was hoarse and

," he whispered