To Our Pinky Promises

immy asked when I ste

iving her a

lates on the table and I gratefully sat d

er. The hammering of my head had dulled down to a sl

e as I ate, as if she was afraid

to reassure her tha

I told her, waving off her concerns. 'It's just been a long time since I

but I was okay. The weight that clung onto me had become familiar

d I didn't blame her. She was my closest friend and after having though

ddle school,' I started to

ed to tell her the story I've bott

m. But we were kids. Eventually, our friends found out about how close we were and started to tease us. I would overreact and lose my shit at them for bringing up something so incredulous and say that I'd never consider being with him even if he did like me. I would cal

nd looked at Kimmy, I won't

rew sick of how I'd overrea

shed back t

ld stop being fr

ow these people can't mind their own businesses and leave us alone. I wasn't exactly thinking straight so when I

ers hitting my phone's keyboard with a l

to realize what just happened. When everything finally dawned o

meekly, 'Remember that promise you made? That if you

typing the next mes

his reply came in. 'I don't like

wasn't his fault that I acted like a dr

type up wa

in front of the mirror and stare

real

glow I usually

as that

one that I could get r

rs to come. It was the sadness that makes everything reminder of him. It w

that's all it's g

as it?' Ki

d. 'That's hal

anged into a completely different p

ou okay?'

o look at

at, too, was something that had started to occur freq

curiously. I didn't think I did an

u stopped being close with Alex. You look like

hit

lly look

It was like a heavy necklace that I had gotten used to wearing. The weight didn't

smile but for some reason, it was really har

thy Kimmy sent my way as she r

mile before continui

p him win her over so she tried to 'repay' me. She got Alex to give me another chance at being his friend and so Alex and I became fri

morning because of the same reason. I made sure not to let history repeat itself and kept m

was w

bitter again, and I had to fight

ything from me started lying. Long story short, I couldn't trust him anym

4 years ago, E

m as we just sat there an

.' Kimmy said

y attention. I

oved him. He was like a b

d, 'No, I mean you

hat she said and cons

d

bility. I locked my emotions up in a cage and threw the keys away.' I looked at Kimmy and smiled. 'In the end, I got so confused with my feelings that

y had a sad lo

never seen you get so down over anything before but one mention of him had

hat's a g

as my first love.' I sighed, stabbing my f

to end a