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The Wrong Box

Chapter III The Lecturer at Large

Word Count: 3565    |    Released on: 19/11/2017

lued husband decamps to Texas with a lady help; clergymen have fled from their parishioners; and even judges have been known to retire. To an open mind, it wil

foreign travel. In the case of Joseph, John (if he were a link at all) was not the only one; endearing bonds had long enchained the old gentleman to Bloomsbury; and by these expressions I do not in the least refer to Julia Hazeltine (of whom, however, he was fond enough), but to that collection of manuscr

an issue. He retained that bill, which, to one of his frugality, meant wealth; and he promised himself to disappear among the crowds at Waterloo, or (if that should prove impossible) to slink

uniform of Sir Faraday Bond, is not very likely to flee far, but the wood was close at hand and offered the fugitive at least a temporary covert. Hither, then, the old gentleman skipped with extraordinary expedition, and, being somewhat winded and a good deal shaken, here he lay down in a convenient grove and

te sound of wheels arose in the distance, and then a cart was seen approaching, well filled with parcels, driven by a good-natured looking man on a double bench, and displaying on a board the legend, 'I Chandler, carrier'. In the infamously prosaic mind of Mr Finsbury, certain streaks of poetry survived and were still efficient; they had carrie

a good-natured man, glad to do a service, and so he took the stranger up; and he had his own idea of civility, and so he asked no questions. Silence, i

h marked with its individual label, and by the good Flemish mare you drive, that you occupy the post of c

r he hardly knew what to reply; 'them parcel

rned the complicated knots employed by mariners, and acquired the technical terms. At Naples, I would learn the art of making macaroni; at Nice, the principles of making candied

ed the carrier, touching up his horse; '

ld Testament?' continued the old gentleman. 'One hun

d Mr Chandler. 'I never

of the Bible; Wycliff was the first to introduce it into England about the year 1300. The "Paragraph Bible", as it is called, is a well-known edition, and is so called because it is divid

attention to the more congenial task of passing a cart of hay; it was a matter

successfully passed the cart, 'that you hold yo

cried the carrier c

the field of study, which I should think a man in your station would take a pleasure to read. But I am afraid you have not cultivated the art of observation; at least we have now driven together for some time,

, who was now getting belligerent; '

med the old man, 'and

erica, you would ha

handler indignantly. 'I w

parts of your harness with string. I have always protested against this carelessness and slo

id the carrier sullen

domestic life, as well as in their labouring career, the lower classes of t

'You are the lower classes yourself! If I thought you were

ne of Mr Finsbury's pathetic loquacity, was out of the question. With an angry gesture, he pulled down the brim of the forage-cap

f triumph and alarm - triumph because he had succeeded in arresting that prodigy of speech, and alarm lest (by any accident) it should begin again. Even t

houses lights were kindled for the evening meal; and Mr Finsbury began to think complacently of hi

he, 'to recommend me to an inn?'

t, 'I wonder how about

ell,' returned the old man, 'if it's

ne, you see, and he helped me through my trouble last year. And I was thinking, would it be fair-like on Watts to saddle him with an old party li

ng, but it gives you no right to address me in such terms. Here's a shilling for your trouble;

ned the shilling, drove in silence through several intricate lanes and small streets,

arty voice from the stableyard

own an old gent that wants food and lodging. Mind, I wa

cely agreeable introduction, treated the old gentleman with the utmost courtesy, and led him into the back parlour, where there was a big fire burning in the grate. Presently a tabl

character of the mechanic. But even an audience of working men has to be courted, and there was no man more deeply versed in the necessary arts than Joseph Finsbury. He placed his glasses on his nose, drew from his pocket a bundle of papers, and spread them before him on a table. He crumpled them, he smoothed them out; now he skimmed them over, apparently well pleased with

e this morning upon the cost of living in this and other countries - a subject, I need scarcely say, highly interesting to the working classes. I have calculated a scale of living for incomes of eighty, one hundred and sixty, two hundred, and two hundred and forty pounds a year. I must confess that the income of eighty pounds has somewhat baffled me, and the others are not

e nine versions of a single income, placing the imaginary person in London, Paris, Bagdad, Spitzbergen, Bassorah, Heligoland, the Scilly Islands, Brighton, Cincinna

faded away to a few old topers and the bored but affable Watts. There was a constant stream of customers from the outer world,

ds, Mr Watts was left alone with the economist; and that imaginary person had scarce

de by many others, both before and since: that it is one thing to order your bill, and another to discharge it. The items were moderate and (what does not always follow) the total s

, as that worthy appeared. 'I am afraid, unless you choose to discoun

with his fingers. 'It will keep you a day or two?' he said, rep

,' responded Joseph.

t me; I should be pl

gentleman, 'I am more than half incl

help you, it is at your service,

stay,' said the old man, '

Mr Watts. 'This is the last time you sha

insbury, with spirit; 'I remain by Act

ur bill,' sa

e old man, tossing hi

replied Mr Watts. 'You mus

' said the old gentleman, resigning himself to circumstances.

l,' responded Mr Watts. 'W

ge cap as he spoke, he crammed it on his head. 'Perhaps you are too in

hour,' returned the innkeeper with

t expect his nephews to lie in wait for his recapture; on the other, it was highly desirable, it was even strictly needful, to get the bill discounted ere i

e station-master, his salaam was truly Oriental, palm-trees appeared to crowd about the little office, and the simoom or the bulbul - but I leave this image to persons better acquainted with the East. His appearance, besides, was highly in his favour; the uniform of Sir Faraday, however inconvenient and conspicuous, was, at least, a costume in wh

isted on board the van. It is often the cheering task of the historian to direct attention to the designs and (if it may be reverently said) the artifices of Providence. In the luggage van, as Joseph was borne out of the station of Southampton East upon his way to London, the egg of his romance lay

as prepared; and there was now wanting only

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