/1/115713/coverbig.jpg?v=649fe65e68f89058bd955906409792b9&imageMogr2/format/webp)
YS
N THE DESER
is to f
s to find
is to fi
have I said them? Too many to count. Every dawn, noon, an
gh my subconsciousness. My
ents of incense and fire.
th all that, something sn control of my own body. It's easier to remain bli
nto my body. That's what finally forces me to o
questions bubble to the surface. Why am I on the ground? Why d
ed to simple cottons and softened white linen-the uniform I've worn all my life, the same one my parents wear,
ovement. My head spins and the room tilts for a
isn't
nted an ugly yellow when I was too young to know better. It has a thin mattress lying bare on the f
s not
is iron and ornate, far fancier than anything I've ever seen, and the sheets are twisted and ha
t is wrong? I can't remember anything about how I
emory is still patchy. Gauzy flashes wisp across my mind,
of me. But it's so hard to see, to make sense of thin
rls gather in the main hall of the Sanctuary to drink the purity water
on vomited her guts out after just one sip.
t was meant to. "You're cleansed!" he'd boomed in that gravelly voice
ividually after the fact. I'd been exempt becau
red much. She die
s taken by the powers that be. He stood in the middle and soaked up our prayers and told us to say them loude
and warm. I look down at my hand a
it up in front of my whirring eyes. The first thing I notice is the graceful curve of darast iron and expensiv
thing is dre
sn't yet crested. I have to avoid hysteria. Hysteria is
, still so dizzy that it feels like I'm on a sh
round, though I do think about how easy it would be
nate is rememberi
sure I wan
realization hits me like a slap in the face.
mation is
neck and when I go to bat it away, I
'm wearin
g night, then something has de
sh it down. Hysteria is the enemy.
cky with dried blood clinging to me like a second skin. Without thinking, I brush
yssa. Don't pan
op short when I notice something sticki
ked
flits instantly to the bedroom window. I can see only darkness beyond the glass, but I've gro
it-and beside it and lining every available surface in the room-are hundreds and hund
hot in here. That
hen I first came to-it is a wedding dress I'm wearing, and it is a ve
he expression, which is both terrified and
a pale foundation applied with a heavy hand. I look
in my life. I wouldn't even
.. I've done
nd the bed. I can't ignore it anymore. I take a shaky step forward,
and no shirt. He's fallen facedown,
er to the emp
spurred by the burgeoning panic that'
op at the last moment. Instead, I fall to my knees next to h
osiah," I
e the nasty crater on one side of his face. It look
ization scorches through me like a lightning bolt. I collapse and scurry backw
o..." I beg to no
es as tears start to run down my cheeks. Ea
my reflection in the silver
bloodied metal swan in my hand. There's a dead man in the bed
lled
lled
lled
/1/115713/coverbig.jpg?v=649fe65e68f89058bd955906409792b9&imageMogr2/format/webp)