Love Me Then Destroy Me

of Vie

orway and do not

air is cool and clean. Light slides across the floor and rests on white walls a

too

e does not rush me. That makes it worse somehow. If he pushed,

ur time,

my body feels sti

soft sound. It echoes longer th

ll hits

kin. A soft flower I cannot name. It is my smell. I k

ss my fingers to my wr

smells lik

rs quietly.

hoes make a small sound on the floor. T

hes. Glass tables. A tall wall of windows. Outsi

the room might move

line th

ite. Some simple. Some heavy and expen

e

p bre

, careful, as the p

m in a red dress, standing beside Adrian, my hand on his chest. There I am

e glass of

ngers

.. me,"

Adria

him. I keep looki

She looks sure. She l

ot kno

"I don't remember

en he does, his voice is careful.

he frame. My skin tingles

tching me. Every photo is an

't you

id yo

d you

bumps into a table. T

y. "Like I walked into

closer. Not too clos

d. "It doesn't

He looks tir

ngers brush the back of a chair. The fabric i

. Clean lines. Everything in its place. A bo

y, pointing.

e. "You used to. Espe

Morning. He says it like

before he

Doors line both sides. I pi

st

neat rows. A desk faces a window. On the

bends under my fing

plants," I say w

lift. "You said

ree

know tha

watches me, his eyes

out of

est room. Clean. U

th I did not kno

om is tha

upstairs,

u

lands b

step is wide and pale. The railing is glas

y up,

ction st

e. Pale face. Tired eyes. A

ook like h

one step below

ad. "She look

ys no

is at the en

oor i

e and feel t

e. Softer. The s

sme

just so. Sunlight spills across the floor. A chai

step in. Th

ind can stop it. My should

te t

as mine

Adrian

s a small tray. Jewelry rests the

My fingers know how

r this oft

ou touched it when

t down

know all t

low. "Because

hangs i

ve

t t

est a

mattress dips under my weight as it remem

I'm being wat

ks around.

. "By the woman

s not

ceiling is white and

cognize mys

ir by the window. He k

ean she wasn't

corners of my eyes. I

er become her

ows on his knees. "Then w

at him. His face is op

up a

all of it," I s

ds. "

and soft towels. Another room filled with clothes I do not rememb

mach t

too muc

," he a

to the l

front of

Bigger than

am wearing blue. My head is tilted back as I laugh. Adria

looking

he photo for

ks happy

e replie

y palm to

now her,"

ilent but the pho

the fear sharpens into s

n these pictures, then I do

she may have given away

know myself and that feels like