Wonderings

| Epigraph |

"I wish I had the guts to walk away from what we had, but I can't, because I know you won't come after me, and that's what hurts the most."

~Based on the same theme of unrequited love, but with the different sort of love-triangle. Written with feelings and passion, so hold your seats pals, it might give you Tachycardia if you ever had serious one-sided love for anyone lol.

*throws dark chocolate to all my readers*

<<< This book is dedicated to those who think they will never be loved by anyone their whole lives >>>

Here you go!

1| Half Hope, Half Love

__________

"If someone you love hurts you, cry a river, build a bridge and get over it."

__________

"I'm nervous, Scarlett."

In the midst of choosing the attire for his special night, after probably scandalizing his whole closet and not getting the desired piece, I stopped my ministrations, only to turn around to look at his troubled expression.

Very rare, indeed.

"What if she doesn't like me?"

When I made no move to correct him, he gauged my incredulous expression, but continued nevertheless. "You know I don't have much experience with women."

Actually, his 'much' translates to "shaking hands with the urgent female pests and later sanitazing his whole bloodstream with the likes of Lifeboy.

But I knew better than to peel his words, and throw the carbs back at him.

"I highly doubt Kiara isn't sensible enough to see what I see in you."

Staring right through his hidden soul, I smiled genuinly. "That you're the most handsome piece of flesh and blood, highly advanced functioning robot with the special lie detector, having characterised devotion and pride to your work, and not necessarily to say, but much better person in real than what you let all those around you see."

But as expected, he didn't believe a word of mine so I continued rummaging through his clothes.

"Kiara is someone I don't want to let go of, anytime soon."

I didn't turn around. "I know."

"If things turn out right, I'll propose her to be my wife."

I didn't respond, knowing its alreadly clear to both of us, that if things didn't turn out right in the end, he'll break from inside and I have to be beside him to help him, recover, revive.

To be back on his feet again.

"I'm not experienced enough, Scarlett."

Yes, wooing women had never been on the list of his achievements.

But there is always a first time for everything. He needed to know that.

He needed to know he didn't need my help anymore. I was just his employee.

His secretary. Assigned to help him in his work.

Not his friend. Present here to give him love advise.

Taking a deep breath, I bit my lip hard, finding it hard to ignore the anticipation of his next words.

Sometimes, I wish I didn't know him that much.

"Hazel."

Instantly, my body stiffened, hearing my first name roll out so beautifully, lovely, sensually, from his mouth, and I gripped his robes tightly around my fingers, clutching them for life, silently shooking my head, my heart not wanting to hear his next words.

Grabbing all my wits, slowly I turned around, looking as casual as the moon hidden behind the clouds, tucking a lock of hair behind my ear.

Not wanting to make it awkward, I placed the selected pair of clothes on his bed, feeling his precise eyes gauging my every movement, making my skin tingling with nervousness.