Save Me Lover

I am staring at the ceiling thinking about my life. Definitely, I got bored from surfing in the internet and from watching tiktok videos.

" Kulang na naman tong boundry mo! " Nagising ako sa pag mumuni muni dahil sa sigaw ni lola. Araw-araw na lang ganito, paulit- ulit parang sirang plaka.

" Nag -boundry naman ako. Noong lunes lang naman ako hindi nakapag bigay dahil nga pina rehistro ko yung isang motor " Pag katapos ng sigaw narinig ko naman si Papa na sumagot.

" Wala akong pakialam! Umalis ka dito iwan mo yung motor! " lola said with so much anger. I heard her cursed and throw some of the kitchen utensils.

My heart is beating so fast as I experience this scenario once again. The feeling of loneliness and poverty. Sa bawat araw na dumadaan tila pinapa mukha sa akin, na MAHIRAP KA LANG. You don't deserve to live because of the lack of money. Worst is, if you cannot provide a money for a while people will ridicule you. Unfortunately, that people is your family. It sucks right?

Once again, I let my mind wander. Siguro bukas palalayasin na naman kami. Paano kali ako kikita? Makakayanan kaya namin? I'm just nineteen years old yet the eagerness to land a job is vehement.

" Kunin mo yung mga anak mo dito! " I heard lola shouted to Papa.

Sinasabi ko na nga ba mapapalayas na naman kami. So I started searching in the internet for online job. May nakita ako kaso puro related sa marketing. I sighed I don't have any idea about marketing because my course is Education. There are a lot of job opportunities I have seen but most of them requires a two to three years of experience. What do I expect?

I searched for more hoping that I could land a job today but who am I kidding? Napagod ako sa pag hahanap kaya naisipan kong I-chat si Bobby, my bestfriend.

Messenger

Athena: Hanap kali tayo trabaho? Bakasyon niyo na diba?

Bob: uwu

A notification pops up so I just seen her message too engrossed in wanting to land a part time job. I grimaced as I skim the job description and qualifications. What the heck is Copywriting? Apparently, the hope in my heart is gradually vanishing. May nag pop up ulit kaso sa facebook naman. I have seen one of my cousin's parents' post. Telling how proud they are about her. I feel the insecurity creeps in my bone twisting it. I closed the application and just lie on the bed.

Something crossed my mind, try ko kali yung Onlyfan sa tiktok? Ang dami ko na namang naiisip na kalokahan. However, my inner self is thinking about the good things OnlyFan can give to me.