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— Kaden —

I was sitting on the stone wall that surrounded the barracks with Sam, drinking beer and trying to stay away from the office for a while.

The day was beautiful. The sun was bright, but there were enough clouds to diffuse its intensity without darkening the sky. It was warm, but not too humid, and the breeze made training more comfortable.

We were a little far, but we could see the men training a little further. They were doing hand-to-hand, and with them were Darren and Eva.

I hadn't had time to check on them much in the last few weeks.

Darren was covered in dirt from head to toe for all the times he'd been thrown on the ground. Eva was dressed as if she'd chosen her workout outfit for a photo shoot. Can't say she didn't look great, but I'm not too sure she got the gist of practicality. She was also a lot cleaner. I've a feeling people are a lot less comfortable with throwing her down as much, but she wasn't as clean as she'd been when she started, and her hair was fraying out of her ponytail.

She may not have all the grace of a seasoned warrior, but she did make out for it with enthusiasm. She looked like she was having a great time.

"You watched their training some?" I asked Sam.

He took a pull from his beer.

"Some, " he said. The wall was high enough for our feet to dangle above the ground.

Darren was getting his ass kicked by Anders. He didn't land that many punches, but when they did land, Anders was pushed back a meter or so by the sheer force of it. Eva was clapping in the back and behaving like his personal cheerleader.

"He's not the greatest warrior I've ever seen. He lacks technique. But he had some ground work done, so he's not starting from nothing. He's no match for our bests, though, but when he hits… Damn man, blood does make a difference. I could train all my life and never land one like that."

"You've trained all your life, dumbass, " I told him.

"I know I'm good. But I'll never have that potential, " he said thoughtfully. "I can pile on as much muscle as I want, it'll still be not enough to match that."

"More muscles? You nearly have to walk sideways through doorways, " I mocked.

"Yeah, you're right. I should train more, " he said matter-of-factly.

I punched his shoulder.

"Oooowww…" he wheezed. It wasn't that hard. I gave him a look, he just drank more beer.

"They're really motivated, " I noted about my sister and her mate.

"They are, " Sam acknowledged. "It will take a while before they're battle-ready though, especially her. But him? Give him two to five years and he's gonna be real solid. Might take her more, five, maybe ten, but she's not from weak stock so … who knows?"

"I don't think their goal is the battlefield, just to be ready if anything happens, " I noted.

"Not a bad goal."

"No."

I thought some more.

"She has changed. A lot, " I said.

"Because of him?"

"Maybe some. She used to be just a spoiled princess. Took me a while just to make her focus her energy a bit more, make her care about more than her social life. She was just starting to be competent at work when he came into the picture. But now she's studying. I mean, man, she's never applied herself at anything. She had the necessary grades to pass at school and that was all she wanted. It was like that about everything. She'd just put in the minimum amount of effort required. Now she's learning a new language and actually studying. She said she wants to study secretarial something or other." I shook my head. "She's training, not impressive, but she's making actual efforts. Last week she was reading our last census and making notes. She gets herself involved in his work and has asked Marie for more." I took a long sip. "I thought she might not want to do more travelling to other packs, considering what happened last time, but she's been studying other supernaturals and has mentioned to me emissary work a few times. I think talking to one who did that kind of job resonated with her. She's involved. She's dragging our sisters in too." I watched her a little incredulously. "Last week, I heard her give lectures to our sisters about getting their shit together."

"She's getting older too, " Sam said. "She's barely out of teen. She's learning how to be an adult. Maybe he's a good influence on her."

"Maybe, " I said. "First time I saw him, he kinda looked like a lost puppy. Like some kind of arrow that as been shot but had no target, just going in circles, going nowhere."

"He looks focused now."

"Yeah. I think she aimed him right. She gave him a direction."

"Not a bad thing."

"No."

"I guess that's why they're mates. They look like a good match."

We watched Darren make a stupidly wasteful move, he got hit, obviously, but he took the hit well and it got him close enough to give a hit of his own. It knocked the wind out of Anders, knocking him on his ass. It was a risky move, take a hit to win one. Generally you don't do that unless desperate, but he was getting winded and probably realized that if it went on he'd get worse and wouldn't get back on top. He was rushing things a little too much, but the gamble paid off. And Sam was right, when he made a hit, he made it worth it.

He was panting some, while Anders was trying to get his breath back. Eva just rushed to him and jumped into his arms, wrapping her legs around his waist and locking her mouth on his. Within two or three seconds things got heated and some guys pushed them out of the way, nagging at them. Darren just moved away with her wrapped around him like a koala. I've no idea how he could see where he was going but he didn't hit anything and they disappeared through the door that led to the changing room.

"How's been your health lately?" Sam asked.

"Could be better." I drank. Sam was one of the rare ones who knew. Also one of the rare people whom I talked to.

"How bad?" he asked. We were looking at the other warrior tumbling on the ground practicing grappling.

"Getting worse, " I answered.

"Attacks?"

"Some, " I conceded.

"Heart?"

"I don't know. I've woke up unable to breathe. I mean nothing was working, I wasn't ever trying to breathe. I couldn't even feel my heartbeat. I was just there paralysed, like I was dead, my head just didn't know it yet."

"Man, that sound not good. Could it be sleep paralysis?"

"Maybe. Not sure. But I don't think so."

"But you started breathing again."

"After a while. I don't think it as lasted more than a minute so far."

"You mean it happened more than once?" He turned his head to look at me.

"Yeah. It was rare at first, but now it's nearly once a month." I ignored his stare. I watched the men some more. After a while Sam returned his gaze to the field. We drank more beer in silence.

After a while my sister left the building riding on Darren's back, they were both smiling. They looked like teenagers. He walked on the grass until he reached the dirt path going in Blakeden's direction. She noticed me before they went out of sight. She rose one hand and waved it frantically side to side, smiling at me. Her other arm was around Darren's neck, her legs on either side of his waist. I gave her a single wave.

It reminded me of seeing her on dad's shoulders, doing exactly the same thing, in pigtails and eating ice cream that kept melting down and splatting on the top of his head.

"Kids grow so fast, " I said.

"Wait to have some. From what I heard, it's worse when it's your own."

I shrugged.

"You're ever gonna get some?" I asked him.

"Don't think I have the kind of life for that, " he said.

"Because you just sleep around?"

"Mostly."

"Ever thought of settling?"

"Some, " he said. "Ever thought of settling?" he asked me back.

"Some, " I admitted.

"It's not so bad."

"Don't it just, I don't know, feels empty at times?"

"I thought you and Ylva were getting serious."

"No, " I said. "Ylva is not the serious type."

"Which is why you chose her."

"In part."

"If it feels empty, then why not try anything else."

I shrugged.

"So you're just gonna wait for her?"

"It's not exactly that I'm waiting, " I corrected him.

"But you're gonna be serious with her or when you've gotten her out of the way."

I shrugged again.

"Ever thought your mate does this willingly to you?"

"You mean like a curse?" I asked him.

He nodded.

"I thought about it. I took measures, talked to a wizard. No one found anything."

"So it's not it."

"If it is, it hasn't left any trace that we found."

"What will you do if it is?" he asked me.