After I Lost the Ability to Love

I had been by Leo Smith's side for six years, yet he still couldn't love me with all his heart.

So, I wanted the system to help me break away from this world.

However, Kevin, who had been chasing me for six years, stood downstairs of my house for three days and three nights just to beg me to stay.

I was softened and gave up the opportunity to leave this world and chose to be with Kevin who loved me.

On the eve of our wedding, Leo broke up with his sweetheart Luna.

Upon hearing the news, Kevin left me, who was running a fever, to comfort Luna.

From then on, Luna began to appear frequently in our lives.

Not only that, when Luna accidentally broke our wedding photo, his first reaction was to be concerned about whether Luna's fingers were injured.

Later, I asked the system to take away my ability to love from within me.

Kevin went crazy and begged me desperately not to leave.

1

Kevin and I had a big quarrel because Luna broke our wedding photo.

Kevin said it was just a broken photo frame, and there was no need for me to be so angry.

He also asked me to calm down and moved to the company temporarily.

Before leaving, Kevin stared at me for quite a while.

"Ava White, we're about to get married. What else do you want? Even if you're being willful, there should be a limit. I know I'm your only relative in this world, and I promise to take good care of you!"

With that, he left without looking back.

I knew Kevin was actually telling me-without him, I'd be homeless, so I should be sensible.

I wanted to have a good talk with Kevin, but before I could go out, I received a text message from Luna.

The text message contained only an address-Kevin's company.

At nine o'clock in the evening, the entire office floor was pitch-dark, except for the light on in Kevin's office.

Through the crack of the door, I clearly saw Luna wearing Kevin's shirt, and her long legs were so eye-catching that it hurt my eyes.

"Kevin, thank you for bringing me to the company! Otherwise, I really wouldn't have had any place to go."

Kevin averted his eyes, his tone gentle. "It's okay. When the clothes arrive, change into them and then go back."

Hearing this, Luna choked back her sobs. "Kevin, are you going to send me away too?"

I saw that Kevin remained silent for half a minute before he slowly opened his mouth. "Luna, it's not that I want to drive you away, but I'm about to get married, and many things need to be considered... "

Luna suddenly stood up and hugged Kevin from behind. "I don't want to leave. Kevin, you clearly like me. Otherwise, why would you collect so many photos of me in your apartment? You pursued Ava so that I could be with Leo, but now that Leo and I have broken up, you don't need to force yourself anymore! Actually, after being with Leo, I realized that the person I really like is you!"

Kevin seemed to be under a spell, neither denying Luna's words nor pushing her away.

Finally, he compromised and said, "You can stay here tonight, but just this once."

Luna's voice was full of joy. "I knew you were the best to me, Kevin!"

Standing outside the door, watching the two people hugging each other tightly, I felt waves of nausea in my stomach.

I felt like vomiting, but since I had eaten hardly anything in the past few days, I could only retch in the end.

The noise attracted Kevin's attention.

He suddenly pulled the door open and found me standing outside, with a pale face.

2

Kevin's expression stiffened immediately.

"Ava... why are you here?"

Luna followed him out, standing beside Kevin, looking at me with contempt.

"Ava, we meet again!"

Then, a taunting smile appeared on her lips.

"Don't misunderstand. I accidentally spilled wine on myself while drinking with Kevin, and he brought me here out of pity to change clothes!"

I clenched my fists tightly, trying my best to control my emotions, not wanting to show my weakness in front of Luna.

"I'll head back first, you two carry on."

As I turned around, Kevin grabbed my sleeve. "Ava, don't overthink it!"

Luna also put on an air of false concern and said, "Ava, are you angry? If you are, I'll leave right away. Please don't quarrel with Kevin because of me!"

I looked her straight in the eyes and said, "How are you going to leave? Wearing my fiancé's shirt?"

Perhaps my tone was too harsh, for Kevin's voice grew deeper. "Don't make a scene. This isn't Luna's fault."

Kevin's words stabbed my heart like needles.

This was the husband I had chosen over my only chance to leave!

"It's not her fault, it's mine. I shouldn't have shown up here and bothered you two!"

"Ava, you know that's not what I meant." Kevin irritably undid the buttons on his shirt and said, "Forget it. I'll explain when I get back."

I forced back the bitterness in my eyes and smiled at Kevin.

"Explain what? Why she's wearing your clothes and hugging you, or the walls full of photos in apartment 801 at Queen Garden, a local apartment complex?"

Hearing this, Kevin's complexion changed drastically. "How did you know about that?"

I flung off Kevin's hand. "I'm going back. As for the wedding in three months, there's still time to call it off."

With that, I walked briskly towards the elevator.

Kevin wanted to catch up, but Luna held him back.

As the elevator doors closed, I clearly saw a look of pity in Luna's eyes.

3

Just as I stepped out of the Black Corporation building, I received a text message from Kevin.

"What happened tonight was an accident. Calm down first, and I'll explain about the apartment in Queen Garden after I take Luna home. Ava, I love you, and I know you love me too, so our wedding won't be canceled."

Did I love him?

I let out a bitter laugh.

The pitch-black night was lit up by the lights of thousands of households, yet none of them belonged to me.

I was brought into this world by a quick-transport system.

The system told me that I had to stay here for six years before I could leave for the next world.

In my most desperate and helpless moments when I didn't know where to go, Leo took me in.

From that time on, I fell helplessly in love with him.

Leo loved me as well, but he also had feelings for Luna at the same time.

I couldn't bear being in a love triangle, so I told Leo frankly that I intended to leave.

But when Kevin learned about my plan to leave, he stood outside my apartment building in the heavy rain for three days.

Even when his fever was so high that he was barely conscious, he still held onto my hand tightly, begging me not to leave.

I told him that if I didn't leave this time, I would lose the chance forever.

He said, "Ava, I'll build a life with you. In this life, I will love only one person."

I thought that the person he mentioned was me.

Only now do I realize that the one person he meant was Luna.

4.

Kevin didn't come back until daybreak.

When he saw me sitting on the sofa, he was taken aback for a moment and then explained.

"Ava, you know that Luna and I grew up together, so I've always been a bit more solicitous towards her. As for the apartment in Queen Garden, I didn't intend to hide it from you on purpose. The photos of Luna in the house were put up just because I thought they looked nice. If you don't like them, I'll have someone replace them with yours immediately. We're about to get married. I'll try to see Luna less often in the future, okay?"

I shook my head, "No." Kevin, I've made up my mind to leave you!"

His remaining patience was completely used up, and he sneered, "Leave me? How will you leave me? Where can you go without me?"

I didn't say anything more, but the last glimmer of hope I had for him was completely extinguished.

"Is it because I can't leave that you dare to hurt me so wantonly?"

"You're just too sensitive. If you just be obedient, we can all be happy!"

With that, he went back to his room, changed his clothes, and left once again.

5

After packing my luggage, I took off the engagement ring that Kevin had given me when he proposed and put it on the coffee table.

I took one final look at the home that I had decorated with my own hands and left without a backward glance.

The moment the door was closed, a long-absent voice rang out in my mind.

"Host, do you regret it?"

I halted in my tracks, doubting whether I had misheard.

The voice sounded again, "Host, I told you back then that it was very unwise to stop your pursuit of freedom for the sake of so-called love!"

Indeed!

When I insisted on staying in this world for Kevin's sake, the system had subtly hinted that I would regret it in the future.

But I was already carried away by love and gave up my freedom for it.

I asked the system in my mind, "System, are you showing up now because you can take me away from this world?"

"You're overthinking it! Every host has only one chance to leave a world. If you miss that chance, you have to wait until the host's body in this world naturally passes away!"

The glimmer of hope that had just flared up in my heart was instantly snuffed out.

Perhaps sensing my dismay, the system let out a sigh in a human-like manner and then said, "Since you're my first host, although I can't assist you in getting out of this world, I can help you cease loving Kevin."

My eyes brightened immediately, "Is that feasible?"

Although I had already made up my mind to completely move on from Kevin, the love I had for him wouldn't vanish in a short while. Just thinking about him still brought about a heartrending pain.

"It is possible... but there are side effects!"

"What side effects?"

"While you stop loving Kevin, you also won't be able to love anyone else. In short, you will lose the ability to love."

I was startled for a moment, but it was a pleasant surprise.

If I lost the ability to love, it would mean that I wouldn't feel heartache, sorrow, or breakdown for anyone else.

For me, this was another kind of liberation.

Without any hesitation, I asked the system to take away my ability to love.

"Are you sure you don't want to think it over?"

"No."

I sensed an invisible force extracting something from my mind.

I witnessed a mass of pink substance being peeled off from my brain and then vanishing into thin air.

In the next instant, I suddenly felt extremely relaxed.

The gloomy feelings that had been lingering in my heart disappeared in an instant.

I felt completely at ease and relieved.

"Host, I hope you can become the best version of yourself in this world. See you in the next world!"

6

I used all of my savings to purchase a small one-bedroom, one-living-room apartment for myself.

The apartment was small, yet it had a warm and cozy charm.

At the home furnishings market, I intended to buy a comfortable lazy sofa for my new home.

Unexpectedly, I bumped into Kevin and Luna there.

To be exact, it was Luna who noticed me first and then took the initiative to come over and say hello to me.

"Ava, I'm sorry. I've recently moved to a new home and just thought of asking Kevin to accompany me to buy furniture."

I nodded casually, "I understand, I understand. After all, it's quite understandable for a woman to want someone around when moving into a new place."

Luna seemed taken aback by my reply, and a glint of surprise flashed in her eyes.

"I asked Kevin to come with me. Are you angry?"

In the past, I would have been feeling sad secretly for a long time.

But now, I didn't feel the slightest emotional ripple.

To me, they were just two ordinary people I knew.

I waved my hand and said, "You didn't ask me to accompany you, so why should I be angry?"

Hearing this, Kevin was dumbfounded.