I have everything a woman could possibly want. Money. Properties. Looks. But I can't give the one thing that's important. And that's LOVE. I can't let a woman be with me intimately because I will feel vulnerable and I have too many demons. The kind of woman I want won't be able to keep up with me. She might not love me for who I am. Funny how I hate him when I'm not close to him but, have this yearning to be touched by him when he's close to me.
"You don't do that shit in my house bitch" Mum screamed at me and at the same time gave me a hot slap that sent my neck snapping to the right. No matter how many times this happens, I still feel the pain.
"Mum I'm sorry I won't do it again" I pleaded trying to move away from her tight hold on my arm.
"You're sorry huh... Don't worry I don't think after this you will ever do it again" She sneered grabbing the hot iron and pressing it on my back. I felt great pain begging her to stop because the pain was horrible.
This happens almost every day and it never gets old. No matter how many times I beg, I'm never forgiven. Sometimes I wonder if I'm really a part of this family because I get treated different and I wish that I would feel loved even if it's for one minute. I feel pathetic but the thing is that, I never beg for their love. Never. Good thing I have two people that care for me at least.
The next thing I remember is lying on the floor withering in pain seeing my mother's retreating back before everything goes black.