Between hope and reality

"Ouch...my heart aches, Oh.. I can't stand it."

"My husband, what's wrong with you?"

"Dad..what's wrong with you, dad?"

Mas Rizki suddenly complained of pain when he was driving a car that took us to one of the recreation areas in Pemalang Regency.

Just half the way my husband felt tightness in his chest and unbearable pain so that the speed of the vehicle stopped in the middle of the net. We pull over so as not to disturb other road users. Mas Riski leaned on the steering seat to condition himself.

"Mas why can you be like this?"I asked anxiously.

"I don't know...suddenly my chest hurts, " mas Rizki replied Sadly.

"Okay, calm down, we're going to the hospital now."I said to my husband.

"Yes," Riski replied calmly.

With slow steps, my husband got out of the car to move to the center. There he lies holding his left chest. Hold the tightness and pain that is increasing. His hands began to cool, a sense of trembling began to envelop.

"It's more patience."

"It's okay, honey, maybe I should take a break."

"Mas, I will take you to the doctor, mas while reading istighfar."

My husband nodded in agreement with my suggestion. After mas Rizki conditioned I immediately replaced him driving the car calmly and carefully. The ride immediately rolled towards the hospital.

Fifteen minutes drive finally arrived at the usual place used by people to check their health condition. I parked the car, then got out of the car and immediately helped mas Riski to get treatment immediately. Because of the pain, for the ER room, it is more risky to use a wheelchair.

The infusion needle is installed, the oxygen hose is ready. But my husband seems nervous. His body trembled and cold sweat came out of his weakened body.

I feel like something's going to happen. The man whose eyes were now closed couldn't see his lips. The people I love and care about are now lying weak as if they are struggling to hold their breath.

"Honey..forgive me for all my mistakes, take care of my son."

"Why..why would mas say that?"

"I feel like this journey of life will meet its end point."

"You can't say that, I'm sure you'll get better soon."

Mas Riski fell silent, I clasped his hand tightly and continued to comfort him. It was seen that his fine grain began to wet his cheeks but also radiated calm on his face. His net is now heading towards his parents. Again my husband apologized and begged for sincerity for everything that was done during life.

This heart is increasingly inconsolable premonition of his departure is increasingly attached. The tears were so intense that they couldn't contain themselves.

"Dad...get well soon father, " Alifia, my little daughter whispered softly to the father.

"Oh my son..."forgive your father," he said in a low voice.

"Dad.."I love you," Alice whispered back to her father.

"I love you, Alicia, and I love you, too."

"Dad is definitely cured."

My four-year-old daughter said she wished her father well. His pure face radiated a sense of compassion to the figure who loves and cherishes and provides him with a good and lawful sustenance.

My daughter Alifia, who is now sitting next to her father, also seems to be getting restless. His face began to look sad to see his father lying weak in the ER bed.

"His pulse is getting weaker, God, may there be a miracle."What's wrong Doc, my husband," I asked anxiously.

"There are indications of heart disease," the doctor replied with tenderness.

"It can be done so that his life can be helped."

"God willing, I will," the doctor responded to my words, hoping for good.

"Thank you, doctor."

If you require any more information or have any questions about our privacy policy, please feel free to contact us by email at privacy.

All who are there really hope mas Rizki improves and can recover. You can go home and work as usual. Can pet and hold the little princess even feed her while eating, accompany her to watch television occasionally fighting over the show that exists between children's series and sports shows which of them sometimes do not want to budge until I become a mediator for them.

At that time I won the father because the child had often seen television and a lot of time at home. Meanwhile, mas Rizki, the father, took a lot of time to complete his duties and work.

The father only occasionally sees television then it needs to be won when fighting for a favorite show. Of course Alifia will pick up and cry and not accept her defeat.

He would cry and blame me especially that little boy sometimes wants to always win and not too understand and understand people's feelings.

In this case I tried to comfort him by carrying him out of the House. Sometimes invite him to play to a neighbor's house or buy him biscuits. Unique indeed on the one hand I want the princess to be entertained with things she likes on the other hand this self wants her father to be happy to watch the entertainment he expects.

However, mas Rizki is a wise father figure in this case my husband enjoyed his favorite show for a while after that he would relent and then call back his daughter to carry her and take her to the family room and accompany her to see the show.

That's how long the figure of mas Rizki in this family. Of course we really hope he is healthy again and can joke around with this family.

But sometimes the reality is not as expected. In the end, mas Rizki could not survive the pain. He left our side of his beloved family. Facing the Almighty. The father of my daughter Alifia is gone for good.

A few moments before he took his last breath. This body is like goosebumps as if there is an invisible figure present between us. I don't know who the angel of death is or I don't know but the silence and trembling are not as usual so it feels to accompany the tears that continue to flow.

Innalilahi wainnailaihi rojiun, goodbye dear people. After mas Rizki closed his eyes forever, the goosebumps that had made a question mark had now returned as usual. But the story of grief began to adorn this heart

I hugged Alifia tightly who always asked why her father kept sleeping. The tears were so heavy. A little later I gave the little princess to her grandmother. Mother Ramzah the grandmother who is also the biological mother of mas Rizki.

My mother-in-law is devastated by the loss of her son who is still very dear to her. The son was still so young when facing his keberibahaan. There is no three-year-old head at the moment.

I used to be married to my husband at the age of twenty years and mas Rizki adrift two years above this self. A year later I gave birth to alifia who is familiarly called Alifia. Now the little daughter is almost four years old. Mas Riski went even at the age of 27 years.

Immediately I took care of the administration so that the body could be taken home immediately. After completing the administration and a few moments later it was allowed to be taken home, I chose to ride in an ambulance to accompany the last moments of people who had joined me in joy and sorrow with love and always patience and gratitude in living the ark of the household. While my son and grandmother ride in a private car that will be driven by my father-in-law.

We arrived at a house full of people. Their relatives and relatives have prepared a funeral service. Mourners came to offer their condolences.

Many came for the funeral prayer.

Mas Rizki is a good and respected citizen so many feel lost. The heartache that had struck him so suddenly had taken his life.

"Please be patient, Mrs. Tanti, may your husband husnul khotimah and calm by his side."

"Thank you for your prayers."

"I'm sorry to hear that, but you have to be brave to face it."

One by one friends, neighbors, relatives convey condolences while entertaining themselves. Tears of sorrow still trickle down. It felt like losing once when staring at the rigid body that was now wrapped in the shroud.

The funeral was also held today. It so happened that all the relatives whose house is nearby have already gathered. Distant relatives have also come to pray, see one last time and want to participate in the funeral process.

The time has come for him to return to the place of rest for the people who have faced him.

During the funeral process as much as possible these tears are held so that they do not flow profusely.

Relatives spread flowers over the grave. We pray,a before stepping foot on the way home.

Hope if this day will be cheerful fun in the excitement in the area of tourist attractions has turned into sadness. The picnic was cancelled and the news broke.

Mas Rizki suffered a sudden illness during a trip to go on an excursion. Sad and devastated but all still to be faced. Humans have their own destiny. Likewise with the provisions of all this we must be able to accept sincerely and sincerely.

**

A week has passed, but my heart is still broken. The sadness still lingers. Now, Alicia has become an orphan.

He already knows if his father is buried but if he forgets sometimes still asks where his father is. He cried when I told him to forget his father and let him go.

Alifia was only able to calm down after a month passed the sad story. he was already sitting on a kindergarten bench. I'm going back to school after a month of being sick and tired.

His face began to be cheerful but more reserved than before. At school, he was very happy and enjoyed playing with his friends. Now a little bit changed that makes his friends sad sometimes. Her friend wants Alifia to be cheerful again. They were trying to comfort Alifia.

As strong as possible My Little Princess friends seduce and persuade Alifia to smile cheerfully. Be happy and forget all the pain. It is sad that a child of his age must lose his father when he will enjoy the pleasures of life.

The efforts of his friends bore fruit. Lately Alifia has started to really cheer up. It's nice to be invited to play by his friends.

At home, too, he who had been moody now began to want to play happily with the neighbor's children. Of course, these neighbor children also need to persuade my little daughter to be cheerful again. As a mother I am very happy and happy Alifia can play happily with her friends at home and at school.

"Where Are you going this afternoon," asked Alice.

"Go to your father's grave," I answered quietly.

"I'm coming, Ma'am."

"Yes, you can."

"Your grandmother is coming with you."

"Definitely ..your late father was the only son of your grandfather and grandmother so they gave priority and more frequent pilgrimages."

Thursday afternoon my family and I went to the cemetery. Father and mother-in-law brought flowers to be sown on the grave of my late husband. The do,a strand is always this self pray while in the burial area. Not only to visit the late mas Rizki, but also to the grave of my late husband's grandmother and grandfather. The cemetery is only a few meters away. We are used to pilgrimage on Thursday afternoons.

For some reason, every time I look back on my life, I think back to my childhood. la figure of a caring husband. Kind and helpful. he is also romantic and very loyal. So much love for this family. The forgiving and generous figure of fellow human beings also has concern for others. No wonder many are sad and grieving after his departure. The ones that came out were a lot too.

They were surprised because mas Rizki's departure was so fast at a young age and seemed sudden. No one expected that my husband would have a heart attack and so quickly take his life. Before that, he was fine and always looked healthy. Such is the story of human life and its difficulties no one knows when we will return to him.

Shall we go shopping?"take Mrs. Ramsay.

"Yes mother."

"Buy new clothes for Alifia."

"All right, Mom."

My mother-in-law will be holding a social service. Visiting nursing homes and orphanages. We spent a lot of money to give them presents. Shopping in the traditional market is fun for us. We can bargain when buying clothes.

But we are not too long if the price bargain seller lowered the price just a little bit we are ready to buy the important thing I like the goods and the seller has also benefited ever I found a buyer who bid half of the price offered even to not buy even though hours of bidding. Not often do I find it but once there maybe this person was interested in buying but canceled after glancing at other places that are better models and prices offered are almost the same.

"Grandma...can't you give Allie something to eat?"

"What did you ask my grandson?"

"I want a white square veil."

"Of course grandma would have bought it."

"Don't be silly, grandma."

"What are you asking for?"

"There is a flower motif but not too many motives."

"Can..let's go to the veil Shop, Ladies and gentlemen, grandma wants to buy some for the parcel."

"Yes, ma'am, but you can call the police."

"Which store do you want to buy from?"

"That is grandma."

Alifia pointed to one of the shops around the market. I was surprised that as a mother it seemed that my daughter was familiar with the store in question. I also asked him why he chose to shop there when the price was not negotiable and we used to buy clothes in the store in the market. Not the one outside.

"Looks like Alifia has been here often?"

"Yes, mom, when dad was still here."

"O..I did, but you never told me."

"Yes, the important thing is that you are happy to be bought, you don't need to tell your mother...hehehe."

The face is so cheerful when entering the most complete veil shop in this market. Indeed, when his father was still there often if he came home from going with him always buy a veil. Alifia did not buy the story where the veil but she often bought when invited by her father to go even just circling around the city to please Alifia always did not miss buying a veil.

No wonder the veil is so voluminous. he always followed the model. In fact, because of the number of some we give to neighbors who want to accept. Usually there is a Playmate Alifia from a simple family and happy if given a veil even though it is half used the important thing is still decent and the model is also still good.

"Mom..can I ask you something else?"

"Alifia, didn't you ask for a lot today, just bought some fruit, is there anything else you want?"

"Do not raise your voice to this orphan."

"Oh..yes, mother, I'm sorry."

Today in addition to shopping a lot for social service gifts mother-in-law wants to also pamper her grandchildren. Actually, I feel bad if Alifia asks for this.

But my mother-in-law Ramzah who is also alifia's grandmother forbade herself to prevent alifia's request and even mother had said that I would not rebuke orphans let alone her grandson.

There was no intention to rebuke my son just to remind him to refrain from many requests. But for the sake of obeying my mother-in-law now I choose to be silent when Alifia whines.

But it turned out that my son's last request was stationery. she just wanted to buy colored pencils and drawing books, of course the grandmother was very happy to buy them. Today Alifia gets a lot of attention from her grandmother. Not only when shopping even after at the grandmother's House still-spoil it.

In addition, it also turns out that Alifia took to this store because she wanted to relive the moments with her father. It certainly touched my heart also the feelings of his grandmother and grandfather. So today, alifia has the privilege of asking for what she wants to buy. Her grandmother responded with joy.

"It's mom, the parcel has been laid out," I said to my mother-in-law.

"Yes Tanti later in the afternoon we go to nursing homes and orphanages."

"All right, Mom."

It is customary once every three or four months for my in-laws ' family to hold social activities. Sharing sustenance with others at the same time want to soften the heart by looking at them.

The heart will be touched and made more humble. Also to be more grateful what we experience is still more fortunate.

We are still given the breadth of sustenance, can still smile even though there has been grief, can still be with family and always in good health. This heart trembled as he watched the parents enjoy the rest of his life together in one orphanage family.

Some of them are sick and need treatment. The nannies and nurses were so patient and loving with and with the elderly.

It was so touching to shake hands with them.

Take time to chat with them. It's hard for me to believe that one day I'll be as old as they are, and I'll need care and love to enjoy life in the old days. We were so happy to see them smiling and happy for our visit.

There is something touching when you see one of the residents of the orphanage who uses a cane for a walker. She is a nanny who takes care of the elderly who have been there for a long time.

he smiled as we approached him. Her face is beautiful her attitude is friendly respectful, polite and has a high sense of compassion.

"You're sick too, like some of the mums here?"

I asked jokingly and hoped he wasn't offended. Ms. who is one of the nurses who has been with the elderly for a long time smiled at my question. And respond with kindness.

"O..so you had an accident until you had to have surgery on your leg bones?"

"Yes, ma'am..at that time I was out buying something with two of my friends, walking from here but when going to cross a large highway fifty meters from here suddenly there is a car speeding we already crossed finally I fell on the car and my feet hit the asphalt road with speed while my other friend hit the car body and hit his head, while my other friend only suffered abrasions."

"O..so, then I hope you get well soon and can walk comfortably again."

"Yes ma'am, thank you."

Unknowingly, Ms. had shed tears and told me again about her who during the illness remained at work did not rest at home. He was a child who no longer had a mother. Since graduating from medical school, he immediately applied for a job at the orphanage and was accepted by the manager and even his job was good so that the residents of the orphanage were very happy with him.

The mbak is also happy and loving towards the elderly. So when he got sick he wanted to stay with these elderly parents. So that they give each other support and encouragement to live a happy life.

What a heartwarming story this mbakya. I noticed that he was quite influential to the residents of the orphanage. During the visit, there were residents of the orphanage who were lazy to eat.

Then, when he is ready to eat and when he is ready to eat, he will be ready to eat and when he is ready to eat, he will be ready to eat. Of course this makes the hearts of other residents of the orphanage happy. After a long time in the nursing home, we ask ourselves not to forget to donate for additional operational costs of the home.

Our journey continued to the orphanage. I was thrilled to hear the word orphan because my own son had carried it.

There are no tears streaming down these cheeks. When they arrived at the nursery, some of them had lost their parents. There is also a father or mother who is still there and some are even abandoned by their parents since infancy because one day our place of care for these children is not too long. They can't bear the pain and the pain they feel. I couldn't hold the water until I felt a bit embarrassed because I wanted to cry constantly. Feel bad with the manager because it starts sesengkukan.

I was really touched by their lives. Until when approaching them repeatedly wiped tears with a blue handkerchief from tafi I keep in my robe pocket.

"Mom..it's been so sad ever since."

"It's okay Alifia, mom just feels overwhelmed."

"Don't cry, smile, mother."

"Yes my son."

Wiping away those tears, I tried to smile. For the sake of making my beloved daughter happy I show her a cheerful face. For me alifia's smile is so meaningful that this self is trying to hold back tears so they don't flow anymore.