Accidental Marriage via Dating App

MAY

I grumbled as the snuggle app recommendation popped up on my Facebook wall again.

God! Why is this even on my page?

I subconsciously scrolled through the Ad reading click baits like "find your happily ever after". I've tried dating apps one time too many. It didn't always work out. In my case, I've always been matched with the wrong guys. My matches were always creeps who only wanted to get laid or pervs looking for a sweet little girl to prey on. So, It was back to facing reality and telling myself I didn't need any man. There was no such thing as the perfect match.

This Ad, however, had been a super pesky one. I couldn't count the numerous memes I had lost because of it.

So I thought hard, If Facebook had refused to stop spamming me with this ad, it must be for a divine reason. My rose quartz was finally working.

Install.

I planned to check it out and then give it a scathing review. That'll show them.

A mail popped in just as the application finished installing. It was from work.

Probably another shift I had to cover. Poor underpaid me.

The app's home page was one sight to behold. A hue of pink and peach blended to mesmerize the eyes. Catching, I had to admit. The logo looked like an 'S' or maybe it was the infinity symbol. I was too psyched to look into the details. The creators were a smart bunch though. Infinity was something most single moms hoped for in dating apps after all. When it was done loading, another pop-up appeared asking me for my sign-up details. I did the necessary and watched it load...again! It made me begin to rethink the whole scathing review stuff. I had serious things to do with my life. Like wash my dishes or begrudgingly look into that email.

One look at the sink behind the living room and my undying love for dropping bad reviews on apps returned.

There was another pop-up. It said, Do you accept all terms and agreements? There was also an option to read through their terms but who the hell read those? I did try once, Only because I was bored out of my mind and the only thing I understood was the privacy policy. Plus, the terms could not be some sinister plans to dominate my life so I didn't have to worry about what they contained. It was the permissions you had to be careful of.

I hit the accept button and I was immediately directed to my profile. I needed a name, a profile picture, and course a brief tale about my likes and dislikes. It wasn't necessary. I had the app already and that was enough for me to give the review but I was just having harmless fun.

Likes? I thought hard before hitting the buttons on my screen. I liked honesty, boundaries, communication, and respect. The generic stuff...

In a way, the baby boomers were right. The internet was our kryptonite and mine happened to be Snuggle.

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